~...Step Into The Dark Abyss...~

Heaven or Hell: Who will take me in?

2009-03-02T05:02:00.000+08:00

i wonder which side will take me after i kill myself. Whatever. Most probably none since the reason i was born is for other people.

I'm supposed to make everyone happy. If someone is feeling down, i'm supposed to feel the same way. I am not SUPPOSED to even THINK of wanting to live my own life.

But i can't even do my 'job' properly. All i seem to do is make everyone angry at me and each other.

I'm just a miniscule part of everyone's lives. I bet you that to others, i'm just a THING.

=Blahx=

2008-07-25T17:40:00.003+08:00

Music: Summer Time - NEWS
Mood: Irregular o.O

I've decided.

I want to get a damn job. Save money then get online courses for Psychology. But it's gonna be hard. My aunt says that i could switch courses. To TP. Maybe I'll do that. It'll take alot of work for me. Especially convincing the rest of the family. Not to mention, the money problems...

Okane...>.<...

Anyway, I hate MIT. So blehx.

Other than that, I posted up a fic. It's RyoPi (Nishikido Ryo x Yamashita Tomohisa - both from NEWS). 'Member-ai Cookies'. It's a one-shot and somewhat...crack? Yeah. So check it out if you want to. If you don't, *shrugs* no one is forcing you.

But if you check it out, PLEASE COMMENT! >.<
'Member-ai Cookies'

'Whispers of a Hidden Memory': Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Enjoy the fics!

Genki dana
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

2008-07-08T12:56:00.002+08:00

Music: NewS Pacific CD
Mood: Mehx

Just a heads up to those who actually read my blog, I did a little layout change of my LJ ^~^ It's Miyavi-sama! Mwhaha. It took me a long time but I'm gonna learn how to create my own layout then I'll use my own stuff...

IF Acer would text me that they're done! >.< But other than that, I might post a couple of fics up...Still just need to get my laptop back from Acer. *mutters* Stupid Acer...

Okay then, using Izyani's computer so i'll check back another time!

Ja ne,
Leah-chan

Oretachi no Seishun 俺たちの青春

2008-06-29T12:20:00.002+08:00

Mood: Hurt
Music: None...(sad, huh?)

I won't even bother to start greeting since I know that no one reads my blog. I'm here to rant.

It's been a while since my blog was 'emo' so I decided to 'emo' it up. Okay, excuse the lameness that is me.

Friendship. Bonds. How true are they? I wouldn't know.

A couple of weeks ago I had my heart ripped out because I got into a fight with a close friend of mine: Space-san (S-san). What were we fighting about? Christianity. She just came back from a church camp and had starting preaching to us (me and I-nee-chan). Thing is, I-nee-chan is a muslim. S-san had spoke of how God is superior to other religions and all that stuff.

I don't disagree with her but I really, really, hate those who force religions onto others. So I defended I-nee-chan. I spent hours of my mind to fight back and finally, S-san said okay. This was only after I said: no matter what religion (except Satanism), we all still look up to one person: the same God (just under different names).

She said to go apart for awhile. I felt hurt but I said okay.

Now, I'm in a fight with I-nee-chan (i think o.O?). She's been having a rough week. I really understand that she would want to escape from it. I should have said yes since the start. But I was worried that I wouldn't have enough sleep since I have school the next morning. So I told her that we can't be too late. Then she said okay, nevermind then.

I became worried that she would 'merajok' with me so i told her nevermind, I'll go since I don't want her to 'merajok' with me. I was willing to forgo that sleep for her since I figured that with the rough week she's been having, what she needs right now is someone to be with her. I don't mind after all the things she did for me. But she still 'merajok'! >.< I really don't know what to do...

After talking to a friend...my friend said that I shouldn't have sent the last text message to her (which was me being emo). "She doesn't need you to pour more problems - especially your emo problems which in a way blames her - on her own problems." Yeah, i shouldn't have done that. I guess I should apologise to I-nee-chan.

I hope she accepts my apology and doesn't 'merajok' with me. To others, she might be selfish but to me, I-nee-chan isn't. I was the selfish one, thinking of how many hours of sleep I could get, instead of understanding her feelings.

Now I do.

To I-nee-chan: *bows* Honto ni...gomen nasai...I'm really sorry for not understanding your feelings and being extremely childish. I will send you a text message to apologise if you do not see this blog post. Onegai...please...I don't want to fight with you...>.<

Well, I've ranted enough. I hope to have solved this before tomorrow. I'm fearing of having a heavy heart and mind, when I go to school tomorrow.

Ja ne,
Leah-chan

Dreams Come True...?

2008-06-17T22:41:00.002+08:00

Music: Hey! Say! by Hey! Say! 7
Mood: ...Mehx...

HEY PEOPLE!

Yes, I'm alive, SURPRISINGLY. I apologise for having my blog as dead as a graveyard. My laptop is REALLY screwed so there was alot of problems pertaining it, especially the money problem to pay for the repairs since I'm over my warranty.

I've managed to steal my aunt's laptop for a while to do a little update.

School holidays (WHAT HOLIDAY? =.=) are almost done and I haven't gotten down any studying at all. Why? Well, my mum got admitted to the hospital for her operation on the tyroid at her neck there.

Honestly, no one noticed the slight swelling at her neck (not even herself) except my grandmum. "Of course I noticed! This is my daughter, we're talking about!" =.= But yeah. She admitted last thursday - had her operation on friday.

It was supposed to be at 9am but we recieved a call saying that it was pushed to 7am. Panicked, me, my aunt, grandmum and my bro woke up, rushed around to get ready and took a cab to Singapore General Hospital to see her. We saw her sitting on her hospital bed, looking so scared.

It was the first time I saw my mother looking so scared. She usually is a strong woman - having to go through my father's cheating ways twice, seeing his 'girlfriend' (whom i have yet to find and beat up with my brother), going through divorce and all the financial problems. She always had that reassuring smile on her face.

My brother and I saw that scared face and broke down. We cried and hugged her for a while. THEN the sad moment was gone because the stupid doctors took so damn long to get ready. The operation started at 9am in the end =.=

Fortunately, the operation went through without any complications. We visited her everyday (at least once - for my grandmum, both times) after that. The scar across her neck/chest there still haunts my dreams. I have this fear that something will happen to her.

Also, I think i've been crying in my sleep because I wake up in the morning with swollen eyes, headache, heavy breathing and dried tear stains down my cheeks. But I've got faith that my mother will pull through. I hope so.

Oh! We found out that the calcium level in her body is dangerously low thus making her completely numb at times. That's why her stay in the hospital has been extended. Either way, I'm gonna have to visit her everyday to support her.

Since it's still the 'holidays', I'm visiting the 12pm-2pm time slot. But when school starts, I'm visiting her after school during the 5pm-8.30pm time slot. ^~^

But this means that I STILL won't be going back to Voice Ensemble anytime soon. I was really hoping that when school starts I will be able to go back but I guess not...*bows* I'm really sorry guys! Please forgive me!

Mah, at this moment, I don't really have anything much to say. So I'll be off for now...Ja! Genki dana minna-san!

Ja ne,
Leah-chan

Boredom

2008-04-24T12:29:00.002+08:00

Mood: ...Nothing...
Music: Daite Senorita by Yamashita Tomohisa

Konnichiwa minna-san,

I finally decided to actually update my blog...I got bored ^~^ I apologize for being dead on my blog. I'm more active in CrunchyRoll - more specifically, a group for Ueda Lovers ^~^

I met so many people! Hellos to Fai-chan, Eien-chan, Nad-chan, and the others from UedaLovers!

Fai-chan: we have to meet up soon!

To the others: let's all save up and meet up in Japan! Then on to stalk Ueda Tatsuya! Lolz

Okay, I actually have no idea what else to say so I'll check back later! ^~^

Genki dana minna-san!
Ja ne,
Leah-chan

HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY, KAME-CHAN!!~

2008-02-23T17:49:00.003+08:00

Music: Someday for Somebody
Mood: Happy & Accomplished!

Hey People!

So sorry I wasn't able to reply at all. My computer is currently OUT-OF-COMMISSION. Replies back to...
Shert: I'M SO SORRY! *bows* I don't have the money to fix it right now but I'll try get it fast!
Shi Pei: I'm still in Singapore, hon! Lolz
Mira: Lolz, haven't heard from ya for a while, babe!

Anyway, updates! Chinese New Year was all right. Dad's side wasn't pestering my bro and I anymore because they had their hands full on this annoying, stuck-up brat who demanded food, money, things and went around bragging about what she can do while she is but a mere 5-year-old.

I was never more grateful for my cousins, Ryann, Rae-anne, Skipper and Inche, in my whole life. They may be annoying at times but they're just kids so they need attention but they have NEVER, I repeat, NEVER demanded attention before. So I'm grateful.

Valentine's Day was all right. We didn't celebrate it. Instead, Izyani, Lydia and I celebrated SINGLE AWARENESS DAY! Muwhahaha! This tradition started last year with Izyani and I so we brought Lydia in! It was better to spend time with your friends than to mope around at home just because you don't have a boyfriend.

We went to Pizza Hut and had a hefty meal! All of us were so hungry because we hadn't eaten the whole day! Lolz The meal costed $60+ T_T I had to use my card while they paid me in cash hahaz. But it was really fun!

Haha! The movie, L Changed The World, is OUT! And I watched it yesterday with Izyani and Lydia. Hanisah was supposed to come but she backed out. I think it's because she hates me T_T She feels awkward around me - I have no idea why. I mean, I DO sometimes feel that way too since she and Izyani knows each other for, like, 13 years already while I know Izyani for a mere 5 years.

And because of the 'third-wheel-syndrome' that both Hanisah and I feel (it's when you feel like the third wheel when you go out with your friends), Izyani is stuck in the middle. So that's why I'm willing to be friends with Hanisah. But she ain't making my job easier T_T I haven't seen her since my birthday! She keeps backing out of trips if it's the four of us (yes, including Lydia). *sighs*

Anyway, since today is a SPECIAL day, I had ventured my ass out of my house and borrowed a friend of mine's PC. What's today, you ask?

...*drumroll*...

...IT'S KAME-CHAN'S BIRTHDAY...!!

Yes, our dear Kame-chan is turning 22 today! T_T he's going further away from our ages Lolz Anyway, I wish Kame a great birthday! And let's hope Jin doesn't spoil it with his emo-ness! And Kame don't be cold back to Jin *whispers* even though sometimes Bakanishi deserves it! Hehe

This picture is dedicated to Kamenashi Kazuya from KAT-TUN, the other KAT-TUN members, Izyani (because she is a hardcore dedicated Kame-fan) and other Kame-fans!

WE LOVE YOU, KAME-CHAN!!~
GET BACK TOGETHER AND AMEND THE FRIENDSHIP, BAKANISHI!
KAME IS TOO GOOD A FRIEND TO LOSE (like Izyani and Lydia ^_^)!!

I spent countless hours making a video for Kame too! I posted it on YouTube! Check it out if your want! The link is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7GDbnb6fas4

PLEASE WATCH IT AND COMMENT! *bows* Arigatou gozaimasu! Genki danna, minna-san!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

EARLY!

2008-01-28T12:08:00.000+08:00

Music: Key of Life by Nakamaru Yuichi
Mood: Tired & Sleepy...

Konnichiwa minna-san...

It's still kinda too early for me to be up >_< Hai, wakatta...I know it's already past noon but usually my class starts at 3pm on Mondays so I'll set my alarm clock for noon and wake up at half past noon instead xD

Today, I was RUDELY awaken by my aunt. I COULD go back to sleep but what's the use? Might as well wake up and do finish...No, TRY to do finish my OOPProject which is due on Thursday...I think O.o?

I don't have my OOPP book with me so trying to do finish the project will pose a challenge =.= and I think by the end of the day, I'll definitely go bonkers @.@

On Mondays, I only have two classes: DE Lecture (for an hour) and DE Tutorial/Practical (for two hours). Short. Wakatta, demo...At least I'm in school for the same amount of time I'm on the bus (which is THREE hours).

HOWEVER, the second class is canceled today and all I have is the lecture. So I'm debating if I should go or not. Should I waste 3 hours of my time today on the bus to go for a 1 hour class where the teacher usually tries to make the class more 'happening' by joking random things, thus resulting in the students not respecting him and causing him to only teach ONE or TWO things...? Or should I just go for my attendance...?

The first one looks more appealing but I'm still thinking. I didn't go last week too since I had to finish up my PMP Project.

Oh yes, the MAIN purpose of this post is just to write out my dream. I had a weird dream (doesn't everyone?). I was in Siglap Seconday School (my seconday school)...At the Quadrangle, to be specific. I was chatting with my friends and had a stack of my classmate's papers. In a file. O.o Then, we all stood up to go to the place in front of the General Office (there's a name for it but for the life of me, I can't remember >_<).

On the way there (it's pretty short), I smiled and said 'Hi!' to Akanishi Jin. Hai, from KAT-TUN. The 'A' in KAT-TUN. We all sat down and I continued talking to my friends. Then I heard someone singing in a VERY high pitch. But it sounded VERY nice. It sounded familiar. My head immediately turned to Jin, who had sang out that part.

I was SUPER excited and I told him to sing it again. He sang some part before singing the high pitch tune. It felt wrong somehow. But I LOVED it! Lolz

When I woke up, I realized that the high pitch part was from the ending of KAT-TUN's song, 'Never Again'. DATTE! The part he sang before singing the high pitch part (when I told him to sing again) was from the chorus of KAT-TUN's song, 'Wilds Of My Heart'. So technically, in my dream, he mixed two songs up. Super weird! Cho henna!

*shrugs* Mah, all I can say is that the dream felt SUPER real (which is cho kakoi) and that I never knew how seductive Jin's lips look up close xD LOLZ!

Anyway, Leah-chan's station will be up later...I'll TRY. But then again, it's not like anyone reads my blog. My C-Box is as dead as the bodies in a cemetary...*shakes head and shrug* Mah...

Genki dana, minna-san...
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

2008-01-27T16:56:00.000+08:00

Music: FIGHT ALL NIGHT by KAT-TUN
Mood: Blah...
Konnichiwa minna-san!

Boring life...Common test next week...Gonna die! Lolz Anyway, I was supposed to go and dye my hair this morning at my aunt's friend's place. But she's booked so she can't make it. *sighs* Too bad...

On a brighter note! Rachael received her 'O' Levels results and she got 13/14 points!!! WAHAHAHAHA! Take that, suckers who thought she couldn't do it! We (as in Lydia, Izyani, Rachael and myself) celebrated at Pizza Hut yesterday. I FINALLY gave Rachael her birthday present. It was about a month plus late >_< style="font-style: italic;">Cho kakoi! Lydia bought a new ring for herself too. I indulged in myself and bought a choker! FINALLY! I've been searching high and low for chokers.

Then, we stopped by Music Junction and I got a new CD. I'll explain why later xD and we went to the arcade. Rachael went off since she had to meet her parents to go Chinese New Year shopping. Lucky...I still haven't done mine yet xD

Here are pictures of what I bought:

The choker! Even though it isn't the plain simple one, I still think it looks kinda cool. But I'm still searching for a plain black choker with a silver cross pendant. One that looks like Ueda Tatsuya's choker would be REALLY REALLY cool! Lolz
HAHA! Cartoon KAT-TUN II You CD! I know, this may look like the one I previously got but this one has more songs and is SOOOOO much more worth it. The price Shih Yann and I checked at HMV was about $100+. Do you know how much I got this for? $30!!!!!! SUPER CHEAP!!!! I HAD to get it! There were ONLY two left!

After much debating, Izyani also got it for herself ^_^

Wahahaha! That's pretty much what I wanted to say. I'll give some more updates tomorrow! It may not be about music but something else. It depends what I wanna put on it xD

Genki dana minna-san!
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Sickness

2008-01-25T11:51:00.000+08:00

Music: The City Is At War by Cobra Starship (FANGS UP!)
Mood:
sore

sleepy

sick

curious

Konnichiwa minna-san!

Let's start out with something here I found on Wikipedia.

Epistaxis (Nosebleed) is the relatively common occurrence of hemorrhage (bleeding) from the nose, usually noticed when it drains out through the nostrils. There are two types: anterior (the most common), and posterior (less common, more likely to require medical attention).

*looks at above statements* I honestly thought 'posterior' meant the back/behind of something. Mah! *shrugs* Continuing on...

The cause of nosebleeds can generally be divided into two categories, local and systemic factors, although it should be remembered that a significant number of nosebleeds occur with non obvious cause.

Local Factors: (I'll write only some)

Chemical inhalant
Inflammatory reaction (eg. acute respiratory tract infections, chronic sinusitis [this is what I have since I was born], allergic rhinitis and environmental irritants)
Nasal prong O2 which tends to dry the nasal mucosa
Nasal sprays, particularly prolonged or improper use of nasal steroids
Trauma (usually a sharp blow to the face)
[This is the best...] Nose picking!

Systemic Factors:

Drugs - Aspirin, desmopressin and others
Alcohol (due to vasodilation)
Allergies
Heart failure (due to an increase in venous pressure)
Hypertension
Infectious diseases
Narcotics, particularly inhaled cocaine
Pregnancy

Treatment (I'm only writing the simple measures)

The flow of blood normally stops when the blood clots, which may be encourage by direct pressure applied by pinching the soft fleshy part of the nose. This applies pressure to littles area, the source of the majority of nose bleeds and promotes clotting.

Pressure should be firm and be applied for at least 10 minutes whilst leaning forward and spitting out any blood which flows into the mouth. There is no benefit to pinching the bridge of the nose or to tilting the head back.

Local application of an ice pack to the forehead or back of the neck or sucking an ice cube can also help by promoting constriction of local blood vessels and thus reducing blood flow.

There! Why am I writing this down? Because I woke up this morning and was horrified to find blood on my blanket (which was OVER me - if it was UNDER me, I would understand). I went to rub my nose (due to the fact that it was itchy) and was even MORE horrified to find blood on my hands!

Cleverly *coughBULLSHITcough* deducing that I had a nosebleed, I went to the bathroom to find somewhat dried blood around my nose and more pouring down. I washed the best that I could and told my grandmum. She panicked more than me but she panicked calmly. Was that even possible? I guess have six kids does help =)

She gave me a tissue to stop the flow and ice water to wash my face because my face was heaty. >.< style="font-weight: bold;">AND together with the nosebleed, every time I sniff, I taste blood! EWW! Mah-jis-ne! (Translated: It's disgusting! Sorry if it's wrong. I got it from Nakamaru Yuichi when I was watching Cartoon KAT-TUN when he said those words and the subtitles came out. I'm writing it out as how I heard it >.<) *sighs* On another note, I'm really worried for my studies. But the thing is, I'm not SO worried. And I want to be. I wanna scare myself to start working like crazy! Lolz I guess I'll do my best! Ganbatte ne, Leah-chan?

I think this is pretty much what I wanna say at the moment. I'm so curious with the nosebleed that I had to write it out. ^_^

Genki dana minna-san!
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Gomen nasai!

2008-01-22T21:34:00.000+08:00

Music: Someday for Somebody by Kamenashi Kazuya
Mood: Mellow & Groggy...[Don't you just love the Mellow Maru & Groggy Ueda? ;D]

Konbawa minna-san!

I'm sorry to say that the 'Fashion segment' won't be up for quite some time. It's pretty hard to advice what to wear when I don't have a situation. So I'm gonna go around snapping pictures of my friends and myself (if we're all wearing nice clothing) and comment on it. I, obviously, won't show you horrible clothing - I assure you.

On a brighter note, Shih Yann and I have shown our teacher our PMP Project already! So all we have to do is put it in the CD and pass it to the teacher (which will be done by our class manager, CK)! Finally, a project off my hands! HOWEVER, that's not all since I still have ONE more project to do - OOPP (Object Oriented Programming Project =.=) How I loathe thee...

This Thursday is our DCN (Data Communications & Networking) Practical Test...*HUGE SIGH* I have to study like crazy tomorrow then!

Other than these few notes, I'll check back tomorrow with you guys! Please enjoy my blog! ^_^ I'm off to bed! Waking up at 5am tomorrow again! Oyasumi nasai!

Jin says 'SSHH! Leah-chan wants to go to bed!' and I say 'Is he smexy?' xD

Genki dana
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Leah-chan's Station Online NOW! ^_^

2008-01-21T21:39:00.000+08:00

Music: Your Side by KAT-TUN
Mood: Accomplished & Happy ^_^ (Lookie at the nice accomplished Kame & Ueda and Happy Maru! ^_^)

Konbawa minna-san!

IT'S TODAY! Sorry for the late post but I DID IT! Yes, I'm partially talking about my PMP (Programming Methodologies & Practices) Project! Shih Yann and I did it! Now we have to do our TOE and GUI which takes about only 15 minutes, at most! ^_^

ANYWAY, Leah-chan's Station is ONLINE NOW! ^_^

I've asked around for a few recommendations. Okay, I got only from Afiqah and Hanisah (o7) ^_^ and I remembered a few from other people.

Here's a list of songs you MIGHT like:

Low - Flo Rida ft. T-Pain: nice beat; really nice for dancing, especially at a nightclub ^_^

Bubbly - Colbie Cailat: nice soothing tune - kinda like Taylor Swift-ish

Like You'll Never See Me Again - Alicia Keys: R&B, lovely tune

Mama - My Chemical Romance: I like the weirdness of the song. But it seems to...fitting? O.o

Kiss Kiss - Chris Brown ft. T-Pain: mischievous and teasing; who doesn't love Chris Brown? ;D

SOS - The Jonas Brothers: So they're from Disney. Who cares? Nice in both normal and acoustic; they remind me of The Click Five - don't know why O.o

Crazy - Lumidee ft. Pitbull: Nice beat and tune; great for reggae dances, ladies! ^_^

The City Is At War - Cobra Starship: their unique alternative music is back! Check them out!

LIPS - KAT-TUN: Kame starts out melodious before everyone goes into a rocking beat! I can totally imagine Ueda playing the guitar for this! CHO KAKOI!

Okay, I think this is enough...don't you think? I'll post up more songs next week. There is a drama series I would like to recommend.

YUKAN CLUB

Shochikubai Miroku (Akanishi Jin - KAT-TUN) [First guy in the middle] is the son of a police commissioner (father) and also a traveller (mother). Miroku has lots of connections and is a very good fighter. His interest is his motorcycle.

Kikumasamune Seishiro (Yokoyuma Yu - Kanjani 8) [Second guy from the right] is the rich son of a large hospital. He also fights as well as Miroku. He is also a good fighter with smarts.

Bido Granmarie (Taguchi Junnosuke - KAT-TUN) [Last guy on the right] is the son of a Swedish ambassador. He's also a playboy, dating many girls at once. Granmarie can't see himself going steady because he thinks the world can't handle it.

Kenbishi Yuri (Minami) [Last girl on the left] is the rich daughter of a world-renowned president of the Kenbishi Business. She loves to indulge on eating. She's also a good fighter, but can never beat Seishiro.

Hakushika Noriko (Kashii Yu) [First girl in the middle] is the daughter of a famous Japanese painter (father) and her mother is from a tradition tea ceremony family. Her only hate is men and can get very violent when they touch her.

Kizakura Karen (Suzuki Emi) [Second girl from the left] lives with her mother, a rich jewel dealer. Her dream is to marry into a rich family using her attractive body and style.

Together, they form the Yukan Club, solving mysteries to pass time.

It's very exciting and interesting. Not to mention, funny! So *bows* onegai shimasu! Watch it! Those interested in watching this show, please come and find me! ^_^

YOSH! I think I will go and get some sleep now. It's about 11:45pm already and I have to wake up at 5am! >.< Genki dana!
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Gomen nasai...[A Reply to 'Amigo?']

2008-01-18T17:19:00.000+08:00

Mood: Shocked, Sad...
Music: Seishun Amigo by Shuuji to Akira

Konbawa minna-san,

This is a reply to Izyani's LiveJournal entry 'Amigo?'.

Gomen nasai, Izyani-nee-chan. I really did think about what I wrote. I was so consumed with my feelings that I did not realized that it would hurt your feelings. You have always been the stronger one of the two of us (three, if you include Lydia). I should have known that you are not one to sugarcoat anything to ANYBODY (even me, included).

Hai, I still remember how we both met. I was sitting in the AVA Theatrette alone, reading my crime stories book and you just popped up in front of me and asked me what I was reading. We DID clicked and now, both of us are still standing strong as best friends, even sisters, after four years of so much drama (mostly happening on my part).

Our friendship is a funny thing, you know that? You're asking if it's one-sided on your part. And I'm always telling myself that I'm useless and can never help you because all I do is whine and cry to you. But we never tell each other these things. These thoughts of ours.

I know you're happy for me since I started Polytechnic. I'm really sorry that I don't have the time to hang around you as much as before. I always waited for your call. I never wanted to bother you. I was afraid, I guess, that you'll be too tired and force yourself out just for my sake.

I guess I'm really selfish for always asking you if you were angry with me for not contacting me after quite some time. I always made you feel guilty.

Honto ni...Gomen nasai...

You aren't a villain. I don't want you to close your heart and put on that mask of yours when you're around me. I'm your best friend. I will be there if you want someone to complain to, a shoulder to cry on, arms to hug, a listening ear, a sympathetic heart, whatever!

I'll never shrug you off. If I do, tell me. Please. I wanna be there for you just as you did for me, so many, many times in my life.

Even though I made many friends in Poly, you and Lydia are the ones that have been through with me through all the good times and bad, especially the super bad ones. I'll never forget you guys and this may sound selfish but if I could, I wanna hold onto our friendship even if it kills me in the process.

Do you know what? I'm afraid. My deepest darkest fear is losing my family (and I think I already am) and losing you and Lydia. I'm afraid of waking up in the morning, seeing those that I hold dear in my heart turn their backs away from me.

I've already got an image of my father doing so. My mother, half-turned, and my brother, half-turned. I've lost the very people that grew up with me. The wall between all of us have risen up and I've been barricaded out. Many times, I've tried and tried banging on the wall, until my arms are bleeding but there was no answer.

The answer came from you and Lydia. I fear that the wall will come up between us and I'm barricaded out again.

To the readers reading this, I know you may think that I am acting dramatic, pathetic, whiny, emo-ish and even, just plain sad. But right now, these are my thoughts, being carefully put out.

Izyani-nee-chan, I don't hate Akame. I've grown to like them. Though not as much as you but I do like them. I'm sorry if you don't like OCs. I'll grow to accept that and not talk about my stories as much.

Gomen ne...

I never realize how worried you are for me when my obsession for KAT-TUN was to the extreme. I've toned down already since exams are coming near.

I've realized that in the whole four years of our friendship, I've done nothing but troubled you with my thoughtless actions. I've clung onto you like a pathetic child but never opened my arms out once to act like the adult when it was your turn to be the child.

I ought to die for what I've been doing.

Honto ni gomen nasai...

Hah...can you believe how pathetic I am? A few moments ago, I read your post and I was honestly shocked and cursed myself in the school LIBRARY. Now, I'm crying in the SCHOOL LIBRARY. Have I no shame? Couldn't I just wait for a few more hours before going home to cry?

I'm pathetic, aren't I, dear readers?

Mah, I really don't know what to do. I'm such a fool for thinking that I could rant off without anyone being hurt, pissed, or whatever at my posts.

Mah, I'll just sign off and stop myself from writing more...

Genki dana, minna-san...

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

MUSIC STATION LIVE!

2008-01-18T14:02:00.001+08:00

Music: Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne
Mood: ...Nothing...? [Lolz]

Konnichiwa minna-san!

Watashi wa Leah-chan desu! ^_^

Okay, okay, back to English...I'm proud to admit that I have finally gone crazy and at this stressful time, I want to announce that I am setting up some sort of station thing-y...? Since my life isn't so exciting, I wanna make it much more for you people who are bored enough to read my blog! ^_^

So I'm accepting recommendations for music (songs and videos), drama series, movies, bands or whatever!

Anyone? If there's no one, I'll put in my own recommendation! So DON'T sue me if you don't like it *points finger menacingly*

ANYHOW, the reason behind my absurd idea is because exams are coming near and people are getting stressed. To whoever who wants some form to relax, they can come here...But if they think this idea sucks, the nice little [x] button is there for you to click. ^_^

I'm starting next week...or maybe earlier if I'm really bored and on the verge of killing myself from trying to understand the work xD

So I'll see ya when I see ya!

Genki dana, minna-san!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

SHINEH!

2008-01-17T11:41:00.000+08:00

Mood: Depressed...
Music: SOS by The Jonas Brothers

Konnichiwa minna-san,

Bad news...My friend, Faz, was called in to see our Personal Mentor (PEM). After talking to him, she came back and she told us that if we fail our core modules again (the ones that we retook for the second semester), we are going to be kicked out of the course...Out of NYP...Out of every Polytechnic in Singapore...

*le gasp*

!!!

Okay, I know it sounds frickin' dramatic but it's true! Think about it...If you're kicked out of ONE Polytechnic, do you think the others want to take you in? After seeing your record? I don't think so!

I can imagine the utter devastation in my whole family, the inner circle and the extended network! The money that my family has to pay back to the school! The school fees and the fees for everything else, including the laptop! I'm the oldest...I'm supposed to be the one everyone looks to for some sort of success in our family...

...And I disappointed them...

...I can't fail OOPP again!...I WON'T! Screw that! I can't fail ANYTHING ELSE!!!

Is anyone willing to help me? I'm willing to do anything to make a success out of this.

*drops to the ground, doing the deepest bow* Onegai shimasu!

Gomen nasai to those who are irritated with this post. The little [x] button at the corner of your screen is tempting. Go ahead and click it. But blogs are meant to say your feelings and I HAVE to...especially this is a very serious matter...

Minna-san, genki dana... *ja ne* Leah-chan

2008-01-15T20:23:00.000+08:00

Music: Girls, Be Ambitious by Miyavi
Mood: Afraid...

Konbawa minna-san...

Nothing much has been happening except Shert darling lost her phone. To whoever took it, I suggest you give it back because Karma is so gonna bite you in the ass one day...HARD...and it's gonna be much more painful because that phone is VERY dear to Shert, due to all the memories kept in there. If you still decide to be a bitch and not give it back, screw you. I really hope Karma screws you over.

On another note, exams are coming and we (VE) just had our last practice before we break and rejoin back in March. It was rather moody, since I had Shert next to me but she had a reason. Other than that, the auras from everyone was light yellow and white, indicating mellow happiness and relaxation.

Exams are coming. Whee...Please note the sarcasm everyone. Of course, who loves exams? I surely don't. The thing is, it scares me. Not exams but the fact that even though I KNOW that it's coming but I'm not doing anything.

I've tried my best to pick up the book and study but my motivation is completely lost and I'm just staring at the book, not absorbing anything. Mah, I'm gonna give it one last shot tonight before heading for bed at midnight (if earlier, it would be better since I want to be able to wake up for school). I'm gonna try...Data Communications & Networking. Oh my god. What a bore.

*shrugs* What am I to do? Maybe I made a mistake to take this course. But since I've gone through almost a year of it, I might as well suck it up and get through another two (or more) years of it.

I was seriously thinking of getting Shert, SuEe, Pei and the rest to study with them but I think we'll be getting more talking/bitching (the latter is usually done between me and Shert only) done than studying. The good thing about this is that these girls still can go home and study but for me, if I don't have the frickin' motivation, I can't study alone.

But I have to. Whether I like it or not. This isn't secondary school anymore. No one is gonna be there for you and help you in your Maths, English (not that I need for this subject), Science or whatever. You're learning something completely different and whether you like it or not, you're gonna have to suck it up, stop your whining, dry your own tears and get that empty head of yours into those textbooks.

[To readers: if you feel that I'm directing those words to you, *bows* gomen nasai. I'm directing more to myself actually]

Other than that, I promise some pictures of the Visual Kei bands, didn't I? Here they are then! Dozo!

Our first contender is Miyavi! I think this picture with the koneko is cho kawaii! Two of the many songs I recommend from him are 'Girls, Be Ambitious' and 'Son of a Bitch'. Gomen for the crude language (but then again, my own blog posts can carry worse words =.=)
This picture is also of Miyavi-sama! I think what he's wearing is very nice! Very sexy! ^_^
This picture is of the band, Nightmare! They are the ones who produced the opening theme for the anime, Death Note! The song is called 'The WORLD' and it's the one playing on my blog ^_^
This is Alice Nine! Everyone looks really nice! Like they have different appeal and it really strikes out! That's kinda part of the reason why I like them, including their kick-ass music! Some of the songs I recommend from them is 'Yami ni Chiru Sakura' and 'Hana Ichi Yaiba'.
This is Antic Cafe, also known as An Cafe! This picture is before Bou (the one on your left and that looks like a girl - yes, it is a HE) left the group and was replaced. I think that Bou is cho kawaii! He looks just like a girl!!
This is The GaZettE. A brilliant band with good-looking guys, reminding me of Alice Nine too! ^_^ A song I recommend from them is 'Filth in the Beauty' which starts out with a pop-like tune and girls singing it before going into the rock element. I think it's cho kokoi! ^_^

I guess some of the JRock lovers out there can tell why I love these bands, besides their WONDERFUL kick-ass music, is that...most of the bands either have cho kawaii or cho kakoi guys or ikemen! For those who don't know, the last word means 'hotties' ^_^

Alright then people! I'm gonna take a bath and try getting my 'mojo' back on track! Good luck to everyone studying out there! Ganbatte ne?

Minna-san! Genki dana, ne? ^_^

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

2008-01-13T21:19:00.000+08:00

Mood: ...None...=.=
Music: Never Again by KAT-TUN

Hey people!

As you have noticed, I have decided to change my blog skin! Yup, I don't have that much time to change as much as Suee or Shi Pei or whoever changes every so often but I finally did.

I kinda figured that you guys would be sick and tired of seeing my KAT-TUN obsession but I'm not entirely over it (actually, I'm NOT gonna be over them ^_^). I'm just gonna introduce my other music influences.

One of the first Japanese bands that I got into....NIGHTMARE! They are obviously a JRock and Visual Kei band.

*goes into Professor mode*

"Visual kei refers to a movement among Japanese musicians, that is characterized by the use of eccentric, sometimes flamboyant looks. This usually involves striking make-up, unusual hair styles and elaborate costumes, often, but not always, coupled with androgynous aesthetics (which is mixing both the feminine and masculine taste or sensory).

Some sources state that Visual Kei refers to a music genre, or to a sub-genre of JRock, with its own particular sound, related to glam-rock, punk or metal, and with strong emphasis on its unique style of dress.

And some sources state that Visual Kei's unique clothing and make-up fashions, and participation in the related sub-culture, is equally as important as the sound of the music itself in the use of the term."

*goes back to normal*

^_^ I really find it interesting and not to mention, some of the band members look really scary and/or really adorable! It's hard to believe that the adorable ones are guys, not girls!

Some of the visual kei bands that I recommend (and of course, love) are:

Alice Nine (another one of the first bands I've heard)
Antic Cafe
Dir en grey (they're more bloody and hardcore)
Due le Quartz (There's an accent on top of the first 'e' since it's French ^_^)
The Gazette
Hide
Jealkb
Kana (She's really adorable)
Malice Mizer (from there is one of the most famous and prominent fashion designer in the Gothic Lolita fashion world - Mana - who is very adorable too and it's a HE)
Miyavi
Moi dix Mois (founded by Mana)
Nightmare

There are obviously more...but I'll save you guys the headache ^_^ My next post is most probably gonna be a picture each of each of the bands ^_^ See ya next time!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Uneasy, Unwell, Shacked & Empty

2008-01-13T14:24:00.000+08:00

Mood: ...Uneasy in my heart...
Music: 'My Heart' by Irwansyah feat. Acha (It's an Indonesian song)

Hey people,

Lots of things have been happening. First up, CONGRATS to the new VE committee! ^_^ I believe that everyone will work hard to help bring VE to a new year! But now that all my friends are in the comm, i will have to do stuff alone...wow, how sad...T.T

BUT, you didn't hear that from me.

Besides that, the Open House is over already! The first day, thursday, our performance was cancelled (VE, that is). We performed on both friday and saturday morning. I'm sad to say that the crowd was rather...

Eto...

Pathetic...

We could have gotten the better slot in the afternoon where there will be more people but I hardly doubt it will make a difference. All the afternoon slots were given to the more "popular" ccas, which I thought was unfair. But either way, we did the best and I don't think we regret it.

I went to see FB and StageArts Dance and Dance Company perform and it was awesome! To say the least... xD

Now that Open House is over, it's back to the main thing on hand. My projects and overall, school work! *sighs* It's getting really tiring and I've pretty much been doing the project by myself...It's pretty sad...

My body is taking a toll on me already...I'm feeling uneasy, tired and overall, empty...It's like I've lost my motivation to do my work...I've got to get it back...but how?

In the meantime, I still have to do my work, no matter what. I guess now I'm doing it for the sake of doing it and getting people off my back.

I've gotta get back to FB practices starting the coming week. I haven't performed for them and I feel really bad. Besides, next performance will be Club Crawl. ^_^

Oh yeah, I've officially withdrawn from the DanceWorks, the first junior competition in FB. I couldn't split myself to come for all their practices so if I stay any longer, I'll bring the whole group down. So I had to withdraw.

I've gotta start my tutoring session with Izyani's little brother again (before her parents come and kill me hahaz) and my curfew that my mum set up (and I totally agree to) is back on again.

I've gotta leave the school by 8.30pm, cutting my CCA short if I have to, except for Friday (this is my part). Friday, I'm allowed till 10pm because I don't have school the next day and it's the ONLY FB practice in the whole week so yeah...

Well, my mind's not really thinking that much now (since when it ever? Lolz) so I'm cutting this short.

Take care peoplez!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

I'm updating...Finally Lolz

2008-01-03T10:30:00.001+08:00

Music: The Church of Hot Addiction by Cobra Starship
Mood: ...STOMACHACHE...!!! =.=

Hey people,

*bows* Gomen nasai! I'm some days late in posting this. My New Year is something that I don't have to brag about. I didn't go away on vacation. Nor did I happily went for a Countdown, etc. I went to Takashimaya Shopping Centre with my mum, aunt and bro. One word: FINALLY!

We got to use the $300!! voucher that my mum had (it isn't $100, I thought wrongly). And honestly, when I went there, I was SHOCKED. $300 ISN'T ENOUGH AT TAKA! Everything is BRANDED! It's friggin' expensive!

I don't honestly care for brands. I think clothes are clothes. Brands don't make a person. It's how you mix and match to create your OWN fashion statement to the world to say "This is me. Deal with it. =)"

And everything there was so...formal. Well, the clothes weren't casual enough. By casual I mean, a simple tee with jeans or something along the lines. Even a casual blouse or layered clothing is fine. By layered clothing, I mean like Suee's style (which I think totally screams 'SUEE - Simple, Unique, Endearing and Extremely fashionable =)).

Everything there was like for the runway. The blouses were meant to go for a dinner date at a restaurant or a charity event at a high class hotel. That's it! High class! It was TOO sophisticated and DEFINITELY not meant for casual outing with friends. I don't know how to explain how it felt to me. But it wasn't something I would buy. Well, I would if there was an occasion but other than that, no.

The so-called casual clothing for guys was just 'Levi's'. Which I honestly think it's worthless because Levi's sold in America is half the price since it's not a super high-class fashion brand in America but was made meant for people to go to work in. Those construction workers, you know? Yup, it's for them. Levi's jeans sold here is S$100. Levi's there is sold US$30 or less, which is S$45 or less. It's LESS THAN HALF of how much it's sold here.

Heart pain right? Now that you know that it's so much cheaper somewhere else. xD

Anyway, I got some clothes. Altogether, I spent about $70 (even though I was allowed to spend $150 but I couldn't find anything else that caught my eye). My brother just bought a t-shirt and a pair of jeans from Levi's and it cost him the full $150 that he was given. =.=

Mine was just a blouse and a long shirt. =.=

Anyway, besides that, I don't know what my mum did with the rest of the voucher. I hope she put it to good use ^_^

Oh yup, below are some pictures I wanna show!

This was given by BEN! When I got it, I *SQUEALED* Yes, I did and fell to the floor too xD I was really shocked that he bought it for me! So once again, THANK YOU BEN! Since I didn't hug you in thanks, I'll hug you through my blog xD *huggles*
I dragged my mum, aunt and bro to HMV so I could get at least ONE KAT-TUN CD. And I got this! KAT-TUN II You ^_^ I love it! Though Jin isn't there T.T He was in America when they made it. It's alright! I still have Kame, Junno, Koki, Ueda and Maru! ^_^
One of the things I bought at Taka. Okay, it wasn't hanged properly. I'm sorry but I hope it looks nicer on me ^_^
Given by Xui Hui I think. Sheryl was the one that passed it to me. I love it! It's so adorable with my typical 'punk'-ness to it! Yay skulls! ^_^
I got this from Gio. I love this long shirt! It's so nice to wear! 'Happiness Is A Free Parking Spot' How true!A skirt my aunt bought from This Fashion. Very cute! Sorry this picture isn't good. My laptop camera kinda sux T.T Anyone wanna buy me a camera? Lolz
Another skirt bought by my aunt from This Fashion. The difference between the first and second skirt? This one has a belt in it. Pretty cool! ^_^ Once again, I apologize for the bad quality picture. T.T
The shirt I bought from Taka. The image is pretty artistic in a modern graffiti sort of way, I guess. I like it, even though it's pink. But hey! Black too! ^_^ *whispers* Though i would prefer it if the colours were inverted instead Lolz
One of the pictures I took on Xmas day. After coming home *coughALONEcough* I can bet you if I showed this to my mum or my grandmum, they would say that they like the 'sweet smile' I have on. Lolz
Me, trying to act smart! Lolz No matter what people say about my glasses *coughNERDYcough* I still like it and I'm still gonna delude myself into saying that it's EMO glasses! Lolz
The pinky ring Izyani bought for me. It's to symbolize our friendship. She has one too. We engraved it. On mine, it's NIGHT-RIOT and hers, it's DARKSPIDER. Our nicknames/pen names ^_^
A kinda last minute ring bought on impulse by my mum. She thought it look great on me and asked if I wanted it. Hellooooo? It's a RING! Of course I accepted! ^_^ There are three small diamond studs on it. Of course, it's those cheap, stainless steel (I hope) rings but hey! A ring's a ring! And I love this one too! ^_^

Alrightey! That's all the pics that I have up! I still promised Miki that I'll take a picture of my new hairstyle so I'll do that soon! When I'm more dressed up xD

But Sheryl and Pauline said it wasn't obvious! T.T And Shih Yann, Annu, Fazillah and Li Ying noticed it straight away and said it was really nice! Though I love Sheryl and Pauline (as older sisters and great friends and mentors), majority wins! So I hope it's really nice and noticeable! Lolz

All right then, I gotta get some rest first so I'll check back another time!

*chuu* <-- for those who don't know, it's the jap version of the sound you make when you give kisses! Lolz I think it's weird and cute! ^_^ So...

*chuu*
*ja ne*
Leah-chan

I've Been To The Year 3000~!

2008-01-01T22:13:00.000+08:00

Music: Year 3000 by The Jonas Brother
Mood: ...Tired...

Hey people!

I'm too tired to blog about today and take pictures of things I wanna show you guys so I'll do it tomorrow!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Christmas Is Not The Same Anymore

2007-12-26T00:58:00.000+08:00

Mood: Sad
Music: Never Again by KAT-TUN

Hey people!

It is officially 1:00AM on the day after Christmas which means...ORCHARD ROAD IS OPEN AGAIN! Lolz

This year's Christmas is tad bit disappointing for me, I have to admit. This year, my grandmum isn't around because of a church convention in M'sia and family there. Since my grandmum is the one who usually organises the whole Christmas Family Dinner and she's not here, there isn't.

Honestly, I'm very sad because the one time in the whole year that I get to see my whole family and I can't. Though I'm used to my mum or dad not being around (mum's usually working hard and doing over-time at work and dad's...well...my parents are divorced...you do the math), Christmas is the only time both are around.

I didn't get to see my dad this year. Even though I sometimes say I won't forgive him for the mistake he made millions of times, I still love him. And I miss him. I still do blame myself for what has happened to my family. I can't help it, I guess. Damn hahaz *sniffs* I should be used to this already but here I am, typing and crying at the same time! It's just that...I don't even have any evidence of the whole family I once had...Not even a picture...Haiz...I'm such a baby Hahaz......

Today, or rather, yesterday, we (as in my brother, my aunt and myself) went to my aunt's friend's house in the afternoon for lunch. It wasn't much but we were invited because there wasn't a family dinner...How kind of them...=)

Then, my mum arrived from the house in Macpherson (she's living there alone) and we hanged around for a while before going off. My aunt stayed behind to play majong (hahaz). My brother went off to bowl with his friends (and he isn't back yet - Note: It is 1:09AM right now). My mum went to her boss's place at Bugis (she invited my mum because once again, no family dinner).

That was it. No family bonding. Nothing. We came, we saw, we chatted, and we were separated. Sad, isn't it?

I remember when the night before all of us would sit in the living room to talk, Christmas songs playing in the back and the Christmas tree lighted up beautifully (there isn't any tree this year too). Then my mum would send my bro and I up to bed early when we were younger while she and my dad would stay up.

My dad would watch his TV (typical =.= Lolz) and my mum would do last minute present wrapping. My bro and I would sneak and peek from the top of the stairs. As we grew older, the cat was out of the bag (no Santa T.T lolz) and we began helping my mum with the present wrapping (except our own, of course).

On Christmas morning, both kids would rush out of bed and run downstairs, begging to open the presents. Some Christmas mornings, my brother and I would wake up earlier and try our very best to cook breakfast. We weren't all that bad. One Christmas was surprising because my DAD was the one who had cooked breakfast - which arrived and filled the WHOLE dining table. ^_^

*sighs* Mah, times have changed, ne? I really want the past again. Or at least, a better present. Not one of separation and isolation. Honestly, this is one of my worst Christmas Days. It was a little better due to the multiple text messages I received from my friends. Arigatou minna-san!

Good thing is that...I have stopped crying! I most probably will start again but later ^_^ Wow, it kinda felt good since I haven't cried that much since...well...quite some time...As the onee-chan (older sister), I have to be strong for my otoutou (younger brother), ne?

Damn, it started again...Just found out that my brother is staying over at his friend's house. See what I mean? Separation. Mum is living somewhere else. No idea where Dad is. Bro isn't around. I guess I'll be alone tonight...Not that I haven't been alone before Lolz

Nevermind, I'll get over it. But before I go, I wanna write this poem I thought of first. It's in French. So if you can translate it, then you'll understand =)

Séparation.
Solitude.
N'est-elle pas ces partie et colis de la vie?
Les larmes ne devraient past jeté au-dessus de ceci.
Est-ce que mais pourquoi je ne peux pas l'aider?
Mon famille n'est pas autour.
Mais la meilleure chose?
Ils ne sont pas morts.
Ils sont juste...pas autour.
Je les veux en arriére.
Je veux mon dos de famille.
Ensemble.
Je manque ma famille.
Je vous manque des types.
Et je vous aimerai toujours des types.
...Svp ne pas me laisser...

Sorry if my French isn't so good. I wrote it in English, then translated it. Why? Because I'm weird like that Lolz =)

Mah, I'm leaving now.

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Oh yeah, NOTE TO V.E. MEMBERS: I might not be able to come on Thursday. Gomen nasai. Especially to Sheryl, Shi Pei, Winnie and Suee. Suee, your birthday present have to wait *bows*

Arigatou gozaimasu.

Outing With The Family!!! =)

2007-12-24T01:31:00.000+08:00

Music: We Belong Together [Remix] by Mariah Carey feat. Jadakiss & Styles P
Mood: Contented

Hey people!

Today...uh, I mean, yesterday (seeing as it IS 1:33am already) I went out with my family (well, technically my mum, my bro and my aunt) ^_^ It's such a rare occasion since my mum doesn't actually live with me. She's living in the new one-room flat alone...I want to stay with her to keep her accompany but she says I can't since there isn't any hot water anyway. =( And besides, I have to keep my bro company =)

ANYWAY, we were SUPPOSED to go to Taka but my mum forgot to bring the voucher (she had received a $100 voucher or something like that for Taka). =.=" In the end, we went to Suntec City and hanged around. We went to eat first...guess where? *sing-song voice* SAKAE SUSHI!!!

Wahahahaha! I'm so happy since I rarely get to eat that. 1. My friends that I go out with are usually malay and THAT is so NOT halal. 2. I have no cash T.T

I'm so in love with Japanese food! It's very interesting ^_^ so we happily ate at Sakae Sushi. All of us had a cheerful, hearty, laughter-filled meal. It was very nice since we rarely do that anymore...>.<

Anyway, after that we went to Carrefour 'cause my mum needed to buy some items for the house. I took the opportunity to ask for some stuff too >.< Hehe...I got a new shampoo (L'oreal Elseve ^_^), a new compact powder (my old one is finishing), a cosmetic sharpener (for my pencil eyeliners), a new Silky Girl lipgloss (the brush one! ^_^) and a new coloured pencil eyeliner (it's PURPLE! So now I have black, dark brown, brown, blue, green and purple!!!).

We spent quite some time there since my mum had quite alot to buy, including with my aunt too. And y'know how women hang around the cosmetic area, trying out which is better. Yeah, I kinda pitied my brother but he didn't mind. He's used to having his female friends drag him around and sometimes he buys some too.

Only black nailpolish, topcoat, nailpolish remover and black eyeliner. Y'know for the rocker look since he is, after all, a hard-core rocker. But he hasn't been putting on make-up recently (maybe it's 'cause I'm hiding the makeup from him *winks*)

After that, we went to Hans to grab a snack and to sit down. We had to sort out the things we bought to a bag for my mum (since she's not living with us), my own stuff (so I can carry them) and my aunt's. There's always confusion if we put all our stuff together >.<

Anyway, we had a nice chat. Ooh! There was a nice guy that caught my eye. Surprisingly, he was Chinese but he had a little of a Japanese look which was HONTO NI KAWAII (really cute)! And he was dressed really nicely! Like Ne-Yo! Lolz, y'know the simple tee, a smart jacket over it, a pair of jeans and sneakers. Very nice! ^_^

Best thing? We matched! I was wearing a white tube top, a black button-up shirt over it (buttoned in the middle downwards), a white pleated knee-length pleated skirt and a pair of white pumps (my friend once thought that I was wearing a dress! Pretty cool, ne? I love matching my clothes to seem as if I have a bigger wardrobe but it's actually just mixing them around!) Lolz Maybe that was the reason why he kept looking at me. He must be thinking, "What the hell? I wear so nice and I end up matching with this kinda girl!" Lolz!!

But anyway, I didn't think too much or squeal so much about it. I was much more happier that I finally get to go out with my family! ^_^

All right then, I guess that's it! I'll check with you guys again!

Take care guys! Christmas is around the corner! About two days actually ^_^

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Sweet Seventeen...?

2007-12-22T22:26:00.001+08:00

Music: Seishun Amigo by Shuuji to Akira [Kamenashi Kazuya & Yamashita Tomohira]
Mood: Emo

Hey people,

I had officially turned 17 yesterday! ^_^ It was nothing much. I just slept over at Izyani's place for two nights and had a small get-together with Lydia, Hanisah, Izyani and Jermaine, my younger brother.

Jermaine and I slept over yesterday but he felt really sick so I had to bring him home at 6 in the morning. I felt really bad for leaving so early in the morning, leaving only a note and a text message to Izyani's phone but it was my little brother we're talking about.

I called Izyani earlier and she sounded pissed. She said it was due to a fight she had with her mum who was bitching to her earlier but I still feel bad.

I'm feeling emo is not only because of that but because of no matter how much I try and try to like what others like, it still doesn't work. But liking what others like is like experiencing something new and in the end, it is exciting.

For example, I'm not a fan of the couple Akame but Izyani loves them. I'm slowly opening up to them but not as much but I can see why she likes them. It is rather interesting.

However, what I hate is people putting me down for things that I like before even knowing them. It is rather narrow-minded, ain't it? But it is a normal human reaction so I can't blame them but I hate it when they start scolding me or we get into a fight because of it. It reminds me of a fight that ended horrible with an ex-friend of mine (let's call her Toothpick because according to my brother, she is as stick-thin as one Lolz).

She would always put me down for everything that I do, not even bothering to understand why I do. She would say that my anime, manga or Japanese-related is so boring and is for people with no lives, etc. I hated it. She just knocked it down before even trying it! And she loves philosophy and all that lecture-worth stuff but I never once said anything about them. Somethings we would engage into a conversation about them but my knowledge isn't as wide as her (since it is her interest, after all) and she would put me down and call me stupid because of it.

Thus, it ended pretty badly after I broke off all ties with her. She was desperate to have something to put down and make her feel better about herself. Now that I am gone, she is asking everyone about me, trying to it seems as if she is the better person who wants to apologise first. But I honestly don't care anymore. I'm out of it and I'm a better, free-er person. =)

However, in life, there will be many put-downs. The worst is coming from your family and friends. Sometimes I scold Lydia but Lydia is used to it and will tell me if I get too far. Sometimes Izyani scolds me and that's where the problem comes in. I'm too afraid to tell her if it goes to far and hurts me. I'm afraid that it might break of the friendship that we have.

With Lydia, we went through five years. With Izyani, it is four years. This four or five years are the hardest years of my life and I am so glad to have them to help me go past the horrible experiences in my life. That is why I don't want it to fall apart.

To me, the song Seishun Amigo perfectly describes what friendship and how I feel towards them, especially Izyani is like:

[I'll put up the Kanji, Romaji and Translation of this song]

KANJI:
鳴り響いた　携帯電話　嫌な予感が　胸をよぎる
冷静になれよ　ミ・アミーゴ

情けないぜ　助けてくれ　例の奴等に　追われてるんだ
もうダメかもしれない　ミ・アミーゴ

2人を裂くように　電話が切れた

SI　俺達はいつでも2人で1つだった　地元じゃ負け知らず　そうだろ
SI　俺達は昔から　この街に憧れて　信じて生きてきた
なぜだろう　思いだした　景色は　旅立つ日の綺麗な空　抱きしめて

辿り着いた　暗い路地裏　しゃがみこんだ　あいつがいた
間に合わなかった　ごめんな

やられちまった　あの日交わした　例の約束　守れないけど
お前が来てくれて　嬉しいよ

震える手の平を　強く握った

SI　俺達はあの頃　辿り着いたこの街　全てが手に入る　気がした
SI　故郷を捨て去り　でかい夢を追いかけ　笑って生きてきた
これからも　変わることない　未来を2人で追いかけられると　夢見てた

SI　俺達はいつでも2人で1つだった　地元じゃ負け知らず　そうだろ
SI　俺達は昔から　この街に憧れて　信じて生きてきたなぜだろう　思いだした　景色は　旅立つ日の綺麗な空　抱きしめて

ROMAJI:
Nari hibiita keitai denwa iya na yokan ga mune wo yogiru
Reisei ni nare yo mi amiigo

Nasakenai ze tasukete kure rei no yatsura ni owareteru n da
Mou dame ka mo shirenai mi amiigo

Futari wo asku you ni denwa ga kireta

Si ore tachi wa itsu demo futari de hitotsu datta jimoto ja make shirazu sou daro
Si ore tachi wa mukashi kara kono machi ni akogarete shinjite ikite kita
Naze darou omoi dashita keshiki wa tabit datsu hi no kirei na sora dakishimete

Tadori tsuita kurai roji ura shagami konda aitsu ga ita
Ma ni awanakatta gomen na

Yararechimatta ano hi kawashita rei no yakusoku mamorenai kedo
Omae ga kite kurete ureshi yo

Furueru te no hira wotsuyoku nigitta

Si ore tachi wa ano koro tadori tsuita kono machi subete ga te ni hairu ki ga shita
Si furusato no sute sari dekai yume wo oikake waratte ikite kita
Kore kara mo kawaru koto nai mirai wo futari de oi kakerareru to yume miteta

Si ore tachi wa itsu demo futari de hitotsu datta jimoto ja make shirazu sou daro
Si ore tachi wa mukashi kara kono machi ni akogarete shinjite ikite kita
Naze darou omoi dashita keshiki wa tabi datsu hi no kirei na sora dakishimete

TRANSLATION:
My cellphone rings, and I get a bad feeling
Calm down, my friend

This is depressing, help me, I'm being chased by some guys
I think this might be it, my friend

The phone cuts off, as though tearing us apart

Yes, the two of us were always one, around here we never lose, isn't that right?
Yes, we've been attracted by this city since the old days, we lived believing in it
Why is it that I hold onto the scenery I remembered, which is the beautiful sky on the day that I left it

He was sitting in the dark alleyway that I arrived in
I was late, sorry

I got beat up, you couldn't uphold the promise that we made on that day
But I'm glad that you came

We tightly held the palms of each other's shaking hands

Yes, back then we thought that we had everything, in the city that we arrived at
Yes, we abandoned our hometown to follow our big dreams, we lived smiling about that
We dreamed that we were going to chase the future together, without anything changing from this point on

Yes, the two of us were always one, around here we never lose, isn't that right?
Yes, we've been attracted by this city since the old days, we lived believing in it
Why is it that I hold onto the scenery I remembered, which is the beautiful sky on the day that I left it

This is so true. I feel it. But I just am not one who would tell her feelings out to another just so easily. I would rather write it down. *sighs*

Anyone has any suggestions to help?

Well, I gotta go. I'll see you guys around! By the way, this above song is the only playing on my blog right now. =)

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

VE Update!

2007-12-19T18:02:00.000+08:00

Music: Wilds Of My Heart [Live Version from KAT-TUN Tour] by KAT-TUN
Mood: Tired Mentally

Hey people, this post is gonna be a VE December update. ^_^ There was supposed to be caroling today in school but I have acquired a fever of 38 degrees+ so I couldn't go. SORRY VE! >.<
This picture is somewhat explaining where we went yesterday. The actual place is actually a block away but it's still the same since it is an old folks' home.

This is a picture of the people we sang to. It was pretty cool. The feeling of seeing them so happy really could warm a person's heart. They were clapping along happily. It is nice to see them so happy! ^_^

Sheryl and me! Both of us decided to act 'nerd' with our glasses but to me, I think it's pretty cool! Lolz!

The first place we went to - Dover Park Hospice. It was pretty quiet (DUH!) but it was pretty cool to start singing for them. I really hope we made them happy. ^_^

Outside of the hospice! ^_^ We were all going towards the bus and Sheryl was taking this picture so I just turned around and posed! I'm such a cam-whore! Lolz!

Sleeping beauties...Okay, only Sheryl! Lolz

Reflections! From left to right: me, Shi Pei, Sheryl, Winnie, Emily and Li Fen (who wasn't posing at all XD)

During one of our VE Practices, Shi Pei, Sheryl and I - kissing! Lolz

Shi Pei, Winnie, Sheryl and me! Yonghong is peeking from behind! Lolz

QUIET! Lolz Waiting for the Committee Interview to start, me, Shavien and Sheryl!
The larger picture of what we were posing around above! ^_^

Mr Ong sleeping on the way on the bus! I think, soon, this picture will be circulated around VE.

During our December babies celebration! The december babies were me, Winnie and Suee! Yonghong's acting extra at the corner Lolz!
May our wishes and dreams come true! This picture looks a tad bit angelic Hahaz! The candles made it look so christmas-y (gomen, I'm in a Christmas mood!)
All of us posing! From left to right: Pingding, me, Winnie, Suee, Joey and YiTian! ^_^

I have to admit this: VE really does make an impact in my life. ^_^

Oh yes, December is a happy and sad month for me! SO MANY BIRTHDAYS! Lolz I gave Winnie a pair of earrings! I haven't given Suee hers yet since I didn't go today. On friday, I'm handing Hanisah and Rachael's over to them ^_^

I guess I have to wait until I can save more money then I can buy my KAT-TUN stuff! I REALLY WANT THEM >.< Lolz Tahan, Leandra, tahan...! Lolz

Alright then, I'm off to write my last one-shot of KAT-TUN - Nakamaru Yuichi! I've done Kamenashi Kazuya, Akanishi Jin, Taguchi Junnosuke, Tanaka Koki and Ueda Tatsuya! ^_^ I'll see ya guys soon!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

My Week's Schedule

2007-12-16T15:59:00.000+08:00

Mood: ...In Pain...>.<
Music: "Call Me, Beep Me" by Christy Carlson Romano

Hey people!

NEWS! <-- nice band by Johnny's Entertainment (Jap) Lolz

I mean, figuratively speaking...I FINALLY GOT MY NEW GLASSES! They look like the typical "emo" glasses 'cause I seriously thought they look really great on some people *cough*KAT-TUN MEMBERS, especially Ueda, Kame and Jin*cough* so I thought it would be nice to try them out.

I don't think I look THAT horrible with them on. I have to let some of my fringe down if not, I'll look REALLY uh...dorky? Lolz

*wails* I DON'T KNOW! Tell me how I look if you see me with them, ne? *bows* Arigatou gozaimasu! ^_^

This post is mainly about that *points to above* and the 'schedule' for this week.

Monday: Suee's Birthday
Rachael's Birthday [From Siglap Sec]
Voice Ensemble New Committee Interview
Voice Ensemble Practice
Tuesday: Caroling
Wednesday: Caroling
Hanisah's Birthday [From Siglap Sec]
Thursday: Sleepover At Izyani's
Friday: My Birthday

There might be a possibility to celebrate mine, Hanisah's and Rachael's birthday on friday. A small get-together at Izyani's place. We're gonna bake! ^_^ But it's a 'may-be' only.

Tuesday was actually meant for me to go to Snow City with Hanisah and Izyani but because of the caroling, I can't gooooooo!!! T.T I feel really bad because it's like I'm backing out of a promise. *sighs*

*drops to the floor and does the deepest bow* GOMEN NASAI IZYANI-SAMA AND HANISAH-SAMA!

Mah, that's all I guess. I've written three one-shots for the members of KAT-TUN. For Kamenashi Kazuya, Akanishi Jin and Taguchi Junnosuke. The best part of my first two one-shots is that I can alter it into a shounen-ai story for Izyani-sama. But I'll do it another time *grins sheepishly*

Alright then!

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

Thoughts

2007-12-07T14:53:00.000+08:00

Music: Teardrops on My Guitar by Taylor Swift
Mood: Confused...Wanting to know the truth...

I seriously think that alot of mixed misunderstandings are going around. But I'm not quite sure myself since the person isn't VERY CLEAR in his writing. So this is an assumption (yes, I'm gonna be making an ASS-(outta)-U-(and)-ME [ASS-U-ME]).

Whatever that has been happening: I don't feel hurt nor any regrets. It's seriously nothing. Pain is just because of heartache. I'm getting over it. Yes, people (but Sheryl's on my side =X) will still talk but I. DON'T. CARE.

I'm just enjoying the fun that all of us are having.

I'm getting really curious too! Seriously, it will ease my mind alittle to know who the person is.

Also, I read once that sometimes in people's writing, you'd think that they're talking about you but you're actually "not the main focus in the writings".

So what if I'm wrong? I'm still a human being. I still can make mistakes. Like I said before, I know I'm gonna be making an ASS-U-ME. So nyah! *blows raspberry*

Okay, childish much? I know XD

ANYWAY, let people have their fun. They deserve it. After a long school day, they want to enjoy and let loose. Besides, IF I start breaking down and bawling my eyes out, THEN you can scold or whatever you wanna do.

If you happen to think that I'm crying secretly, (maybe I am =X) then DAIJOUBU! It's okay. Wait for me to complain then start!

Okay, I'm going out of hand and ranting already. Nevermind, I'm ending here now.

*ja ne*
Leah-chan

...^_^...

2007-12-02T23:27:00.000+08:00

Mood: Smile-y
Music: Make U Wet by KAT-TUN [Tanaka Koki]

December is here and I LOVE IT! It's my most favourite month of the year because well, it has my birthday and Christmas in them! In other parts of the world, people get to experience the season, winter (oh, how I would like to experience it too)! However, in Singapore, it's the rainy season T.T

Mah, looking on the brighter side of this: I LOVE DECEMBER!

And randomly: I LOVE KAT-TUN! Lolz

Yes, I'm pretty glad to have found this band since it has taken my mind off. Finally, I've realised my crushes were, indeed, infatuation. So I don't have to lament. Sure, feelings will come back but why dwell on something will not happen? Especially if the person won't like you ^_^

Don't worry people, I'm not sad. Chotto chotto only! DEMO SA! Daijoubu! I'm fine ^_^

I guess this is another thing of life that we can't escape: heartache. But we have to learn to forget and move on! Hehe...Having known and be absolutely crazy over KAT-TUN has helped in many ways since I don't have to lament about my problems Lolz

Not to mention, dozens and DOZENS of story plots are running through my mind and I really wanna write them all down but I have to sit down, catch one and start first. That's the hard part. XP

"I'll do it another time," is my favourite phrase but this time, I have more important things going on. EXAMS! *Jaws music playing in the background and thunder and lightning sounds and flashes* Lolz

Yup, I can't believe that I'm actually gonna have exams during DECEMBER! Mah, there's a first for everything! ;P AHHH...Shih Yann's birthday [2nd Dec] has passed already (exactly 27 minutes from when I'm writing this sentence) and there are still more to come.

Hmm...let's see...We have Winnie [5th Dec], Suee [17th Dec], Rachael [17th Dec], Hanisah (Siglap Sec) [19th Dec] and then finally, MINE [21st Dec]! I'm forever the youngest T.T Lolz but no matter! A birthday is still a birthday - a sign that you're getting older and in Tanaka Koki's words: "A year closer to death"

LOLZ!

The other members whacked him for being so negative! Lolz! *sighs dreamily* They're all so cute! Lolz

!NEWS!

2007-11-26T16:22:00.000+08:00

Mood: Contented
Music: NONE [In class, semi-listening & taking down notes]

Konnichiwa minna-san!

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"

This phrase means that when you're away from your 'love', you find yourself missing him/her more and more. Ever wonder if he/she is THE ONE? I know we're only teenagers so in my opinion, THE ONE usually doesn't arrive yet. You have the whole life of yourself ahead of you, so it doesn't mean that the person that you're with is THE ONE - right now at this moment and in your mind, forever and will be.

HOWEVER, starting early won't kill anyone. Start finding now before it's too late is also the mindset of many teenagers these days. I won't 'diss' anyone for their mindset. I mean, we are who we are. But I thought that it won't kill to give a little advice.

*hangs head in shame* I know! I don't have the experience to give me the right to give out any advice! But...I've been getting alot of friends having problems with either their boyfriend/girlfriend dumping them for another.

My advice? Life's like that. All we can do is curse the person to the next century and move on with our lives. If you continue to lament in the past and not look forward to the future, then it'll not only make you irritate others, it'll also make you - not the person you're cursing - look pathetic.

If you feel that you and your significant other drifting further and further apart and your heart doesn't feel the pain - honestly, look inside your heart. Don't feel sad because you yearn for a person to love; to be with. If you truly feel that way, then that person may be the person for you. But if you don't feel anything, then don't lament in this. Give it a few weeks then if still nothing, don't wave around.

I know I kinda sound bad. >.< Gomen ne...I guess I can't really put it out in words on a paper - or in this case, a laptop...

But waving around is kinda giving the other person a false sense of hope. IF you are at the end (the one HAVING the false sense of hope) and the person isn't feeling anything else, DON'T FORCE!

Seriously, it'll make you look, once again, pathetic.

Letting go is part and parcel of life. So this is a way for us to learn the hardships and enjoy the things life has to offer. Oh my god, I sound old! Lolz

Anyway, I'm heading off already!

Ja ne!
Leah-chan

P.S. I'm thinking of starting a new story! Romance, duh! Any helpers? =)

DROOLZ

2007-11-22T12:41:00.000+08:00

Mood: Stuffed *groans*
Music: Keep The Faith by KAT-TUN

Hey people!!!

I'm currently sitting in AMK's MacDonalds and am bored outta my mind. I'll start watching my Jap Drama, Gokusen 2, soon but FIRST! I DID tag Shi Pei that I'm gonna put up pictures of my 'husbands' Lolz

SO I SHALL!!!

Introducing THREE of my 'husbands', (from left to right) Ueda Tatsuya, Akanishi Jin and Kamenashi Kazuya!!!

Aren't they so hot? The others actually include Matsumoto Jun, Shun Oguri, Teppei Koike and Ikuta Toma....Hehehehehehe *giggles* I'm dreaming but who cares? *sticks out tongue childishly* I LOVE THEM!

Ah >.< my Gokusen 2 is calling out to me, so I shall leave for now! Ja ne, minna-san!

Leah-chan

Up & Down Day

2007-11-20T23:25:00.000+08:00

Konnichiwa minna-san! ^_^

Today was kinda uh...so-so day I guess...Went to school a little late (since I woke up REALLY late so I had to take a taxi *sighs* which caused me $15.30 T.T)...uh...I won't go into detail about what I did since it ain't anything to be proud of >.<

I went home (watched a little of Gokusen 2 on bus 72 HeHe ^_^) and slept a little before Izyani called me at around uh...5pm+? Yup, I went to meet her because she wanted to go and get a present for her parents' anniversary.

Great things happen!

THERE WAS A RAMEN TEN IN TAMPINES! Finally! We didn't have to go ALL THE WAY to Far East if we wanted to eat ramen ^_^

THE COFFEEBEAN WAS OPEN AGAIN! Hahaz, I missed it but I didn't get to buy anything since I was pretty full from the ramen at Ramen Ten.

We bought our stuff (I bought some stuff for my otoutou - little brother, Jermaine - since his birthday is next week's Wednesday. I decided to buy now since I won't know when I'll get the time to go and buy his present) and headed for Pasir Ris.

And guess what? Izyani spotted this REALLY HAWT/HOT/HOTT Chinese guy *sighs dreamily and droolz*. He was wearing a suit and carrying the bag that you see the Jap schoolboy actors on the drama series carrying and HE WAS REALLY REALLY TALL!!!

Not THAT tall till I have to tilt my head all the way up but it seems like a height which I don't mind and I'm pretty sure his looks will change my mind if I'm unsure about the height ;P

He had this really Jap look. I mean, his facial features were so beautiful/hott. ARGH! I can't even explain it but when you see him, you just can't help but stare. I mean, IZYANI is a self-proclaimed asexual and she was staring at him too!! His hair style was...KAKOI!!! It was dyed (duh) but he TOTALLY reminded me of Nakatsu Shuichi (Hana-Kimi Jap), Kagurazaka Makotoor (Hana-Kimi Jap) or Odagiri Ryu (Gokusen 2) - more of Kaurazaka and Ryu actually - and I totally melted!!!!!!

Wait for it...*takes a deep breath*

...*silence*...

*squeals loudly* KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!

...*silence*...

My heart is still beating so fast!

So now I know! He lives in Pasir Ris! I hope to see him again. Totally can't miss him. He's taller than the average guy! Lolz

Okay, okay - enough squealing. I'll go back to watching my Gokusen 2 before I go and sleep. Take care, minna-san!

Oyasumi nasai,
Leandra-chan ^_^

VE Outing

2007-11-18T23:28:00.000+08:00

Hey people!

Yesterday was the VE Retreat/Housewarming Party at Ben's new place. One word about his place: SUGOI! It was SOOOOO nice! It reminded me of my old house - of course, his was much more modernized and simple. ^_^

There was ALOT of food since it was Potluck too. For those who don't know, potluck is where every guest had to bring some kinda food. I felt kinda bad 'cause I woke up REALLY late and I didn't have the time to go and get anything. >.< I was supposed to get a cake.

In the end, there were leftovers anyway. HeHe. It was pretty cool, the whole thing. We watched TV, played Taboo and some of us played Majong too!

Oh yeah, Sheryl, Shi Pei and I decided to prank call the Majong players since they were SOOOOO concentrated on the game. IT WAS SO FUN! XP

Anyway, around 6pm, all of us left since we stayed there long enough. Sheryl went to her Aunt's place, Ben obviously stayed home and Nicholas and Emily went off, as did Gerald, Matthias, Yonghong and Eric (bass) [Eric (tenor) didn't come =.=]. The rest of us decided to go to The Cathy to watch a movie. What luck. Everything was pretty much booked. So we went to Ben & Jerry's to chill out and gossip. XP It was my first time at a Ben & Jerry's! ^_^

We played this game (I can't, for the life of me, remember what was the name of the game XP) where you have to state three things about yourself; 2 truths and 1 lie, while the others had to guess which was the lie. It was pretty fun and we knew more about each other! YAY BONDING SESSION! ^_^

Then we played Truth Or Dare (yes, call us children XP). The dares were interesting. Pudding had to sing a chorus of a song outloud (she sang Dancing Queen). ET had to ask three people where the toilet was...in front of the entrance to the path to the toilet. SX had to talk to a dustbin until five people walked past him (an old man was staring at him). CY had to wish a nearby birthday boy 'Happy Birthday'. Suee had to ask someone to take a picture of her and her 'imaginary friend'. She was smart enough to ask a staff of Ben & Jerry's. Kah Hong had to tie his tie around a postcard stand and like, pole dance to it. XP!

The truths were interesting...except for me. >.< DEAREST (note the sarcasm) Pudding decided to ask what my feelings were for SX. I refused to answer. And to add salt to the wound, she said, "Your actions tell me everything."

OMG WTH! Lolz

Honestly, this was what I wanted to say: "My feelings aren't all that important because I'm sure not only me, but also SX, have better things to be concerned about. If they are being returned, then that's great! But at the moment in time, what is the best is to create endless bonds with not only SX, but with the WHOLE OF VE too. I'm very much contented with the Friendship Status that I have with everyone already. And I really hope this doesn't cause much awkwardness between SX and myself."

I know what you might say. "Are you frickin' insane? Writing your feelings on this blog where everyone can read it?" Well, I say that a blog is meant for many things. To me, it's to let others experience the same thing I do, if they want to. And to express my feelings because I have found out the HARD way that keeping your feelings inside isn't the best thing because sooner or later, you'll break down really badly.

I don't want to think so much about this whole SX thing. I'm not asking people to stop their teasings because I admit, I do find amusement from everything. If you want to continue, go ahead! ^_^ I'll just play along!

But Suee told me this: Don't think so much about it. Just go back to playing along and have fun.

I agree with this. So SX, I hope you don't mind this. If you feel awkward, then voice it. *bows* Gomen nasai for all the trouble.

Pudding and the rest of VE, I'm not angry or anything about this. I would like to thank you guys actually. At least, I've got some weight off my chest. ^_^ *bows* Arigatou gozaimasu!

Well, it's pretty late and I'm really shacked. I'm off to bed! Oyasumi nasai!

Ja ne,
Leandra

Sometimes...Fun Happens Without You...

2007-11-13T18:57:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

I'm on MC...Yes, AGAIN! I FEEL SO GUILTY!!

Updates from VE: THEY SHOWED THIS BLOG TO SX! *grumbles* Stupid girls...

So, *smiles brightly* I'm gonna plot my revenge! Lolz but I'm too sleepy (must be the medicine) to think of anything right now.

I'm gonna watch three episodes of Hana Kimi, while eating dinner, take my medicines again, and get some sleep. ^.^

Oh yeah, there's a lunchtime concert for FB. I'm SUPPOSED to be in it but since I don't know the routine, I was suppose to learn them yesterday but since I've been on MC since yesterday to wednesday. *sighs* I was really hoping to perform. But oh well, *shrugs sadly*...

Will blog more soon!

Always Synyster,
Leandra

FINALLY!

2007-11-11T04:19:00.000+08:00

Mood: Estatic! Super High!

Music: Flavor Of Life by Utada Hikaru

I DID IT! I finally watched finished Hana Yori Dango BOTH SEASONS! *dances around the room wildly* I have to say...I am in love with HANAZAWA RUI and NISHIKADA SOUJIROH!!!

This is the main cast of Hana Yori Dango. The members of F4 (no, not that Taiwan boy-band ~thing~...I don't like the Taiwan F4 - which is probably why I do not even want to have the thought of watching the Taiwan version of Hana Yori Dango) and the main character.

From left to right: Nishikado Soujiroh *sighs dreamily*, Hanazawa Rui *squeals*, Makino Tsukushi, Domyouji Tsukasa and Mimasaka Akira.

From DramaWiki:

Makino Tsukushi is the only poor student at Eitoku Gakuen, the school of the ridiculously rich and privileged that is ruled by Flower 4 or F4, a group of four boys who come from extremely powerful families: Domyouji Tsukasa, the leader and heir of the Domyouji World Finanace Group; Hanazawa Rui, the introverted son of a large company; Nishikado Soujiroh, a player who is the heir of a tea ceremony school; and Mimasaka Akira, a madam killer with ties to the underground. If a student gets on the F4's bad side, he/she gets a red notice and is bullied and driven out of school.

Makino hopes to pass her days quietly -- without drawing any attention to herself -- but one day, she stands up to Domyouji in defence of her friend. The next day, Makino gets the dreaded red notice. Even though she is harassed, Makino decides to keep going to school because she is a "tough weed". She declares war right back on the F4. Her resolve gets the attention of her crush Hanazawa Rui and oddly enough, rouses romantic feelings in her worst enemy, Domyouji Tsukasa.

The series is based on the Japanese shoujo manga "Hana Yori Dango" (Boys Before Flowers) by Kamio Yoko.

That was the first season synopsis. This is the second season:

This second season of Hana Yori Dango picks up right after Domyouji leaves for New York. After confessing to Domyouji, Makino has not spoken to him for a year. Rui and the other members of F4 try and help Makino meet Domyouji again by going to New York for the christmas holidays. Though F4 and Makino meet Domyouji again, he has become a completely different person, and so they leave for Japan.

Some time later, Domyouji's mother announces that they will be returning to Japan. There, they hold a giant super-rich and classy birthday party for Domyouji and announce something very impotany. Domyouji, like in the first season, is engaged to a rich girl and heir. The only difference is that they are to be wed soon. What will Makino do?

On the side, Rui begins to fall in love with Makino...will this become a love...square?

Rui --> Makino --> Domyouji --> Shigeru (arranged fiancee of Domyouji)

This is my adorable, kawaii, super cute, super lovely, super squeal-licious Hanazawa Rui! His real name is Shun Oguri ^.^

This is my handsome, also super squeal-licious, droolworthy Nishikado Soujiroh! His real name is Matsuda Shota ^.^

Hahaz, I'm definitely going crazy already! I've already started downloading the episode of Hana-Kimi, another drama series recommended to me by Izyani-nee-sama! ^.^ But I must also keep in mind my resolutions so ganbatte!

Always Synyster,

Leandra

Tired Outta My Head

2007-11-09T16:34:00.001+08:00

Mood: I Think I'm Gonna Faint Anytime Soon

Music: Planeterium by Ai Otsuka (From Hana Yori Dango)

Hi...

It's been awhile and I am sad to report that I am...COMPLETELY ADDICTED TO JAPANESE DRAMAS...I've been sleeping late due to my insomnia so I decided to watch them. Not a good idea, I might add XP

I can't stop Hana Yori Dango and I'm already into the second season...I started...um...on the past weekend, a couple of days after Les Voix I guess...Yup, I've went through the full 9 episodes of the first season and 7 episodes of the second season in...anou >.<...7 days? XP

I told you I'm complete addicted to it!

Anyway, there's nothing much to report. I've just been getting more and more of the Jap dramas and less and less of sleep. Yuppers! I'm kinda panicking because due to lack of sleep, I'm getting sicker and sicker (which isn't much of a surprise anyway lol). And when I'm sick, I can't go to school. When I can't go to school, I miss so much (in addition to the amount that I have already missed).

It's a whole process:
More Jap Drama ==> Less Sleep
Less Sleep ==> Sick
Sick ==> No School
No School ==> No Lesson
No Lesson ==> No Learning
No Learning ==> FAIL!!!

*tugs on pigtails* NO WAY AM I GONNA FAIL! So I have made a resolution! -- which I will TRY (Keyword: TRY) to abide by.

10pm sleep - latest is 11pm (unless CCA - which is midnight - my latest latest timing)
Jap Dramas are to watch AT HOME ONLY! Or during long break hours - but as it get closer to test days, STUDY during break!!

Those two are the key ones. If I abide by them, I should get a little more sleep and do well on my studies. I REALLY REALLY hope so. So, those who can lend a help, *bows really low* ONEGAI! (Please!) Help me! Arigatou gozaimasu!

Yosh! I shall try my best! Ganbatte! XP

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Lovely Complex

2007-11-06T08:20:00.000+08:00

Hey guys!

As you know, I'm a BIG anime fan (well, Izyani-sama is a bigger fan than me >.<) and I recently found this romantic comedy, Lovely Complex.

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! I laughed, I cried, I smiled, I frowned, hell, I even frickin' squealed over the whole 'kawaii-ness' of it!

I introduced this anime to my dear Susu ^.^ and she, too, loves it! *evil laugh* Aren't I the best? Just yesterday night, I stumbled upon the live-action/drama movie. I usually don't watch dramas. Okay, I don't watch dramas from animes AT ALL.

Instead, I perfer the anime because their hair colour, eye colour, overall features look GOOD on the anime characters but completely WEIRD on the Japanese actors and actresses. But since I love the anime, I thought: The drama can't be THAT bad, can it? So I tried (and told Susu the link too) and...

IT WAS BLOODY BRILLANT! Risa looks rather odd but Otani is...*squeals* SOOOOOOO KAWAII!!! My new love, adding onto the other maybe more realistic loves. Lolz

Okay, for those who are confused as to what Lovely Complex is about.

[Taken from Wikipedia]

Lovely Complex is a love story between a boy and a girl. The girl, Risa Koizumi, is 172cm tall - much taller than the average Japanese girl. The boy, Atsushi Otani, is 156cm - way below the average height of the Japanese boy. Because of this, they are known as their school's comedy duo because there is a popular comedy duo that has a similar height difference. So people also call them "All Hanshin Kyojin" team.

During summer school, a very tall student (from another class) shows up and Risa immediately falls for him, as she has had bad luck with boys in the past because she is tall. There is a girl that Atsushi likes as well, so Risa and Otani decide to put aside their differences and help each other get their love interests. But as they get to know each other better, Risa's feelings for Otani begin to blossom, and her love life gets complicated from here.

There! Isn't it interesting? The first thing that caught my eye was the fact that the main couple has a height difference. Instead of the guy being tall and the girl being shorter than him, it's vice versa! So cool! And not to mention, Risa - who is insecure about her height - reminds me of me - who is insecure of myself as a whole >.<

Anyway, the drama - there are a few difference but...Otani-kun is so kawaii! His real name is Teppei Koike.

Teppei Koike (小池徹平, Koike Teppei, born January 5, 1986) is an actor, and singer from Japan. His nicknames are "Teppei-chan", "Teppei-kun", and "Te-chan". He was born in Osakasayama, Osaka. Capricorn. His blood type is B. He belongs to the production company BURNING PRODUCTIONS and is a member of the singer-songwriter duo WaT.

Here's how he looks like:

ISN'T HE ADORABLE???!!! *sighs dreamily...then squeals loudly* I've been squealing since yesterday night - or rather, since I've started watching the anime - and I can't stop. Lolz

I have not been this crazy over any actor to the point that I write about him in my blog before. This is a first. I feel so fan-girlish. It sounds so weird coming from me but after all, I AM a girl. ^.^ so I'm allowed to do all the squealing I want.

So a few last words: TEPPEI-KUN IS SOOOOOO KAWAII!!!!

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Disbelief Appears!

2007-11-05T16:27:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

The whole happiness of Les Voix haven't faded but in some blogs, it has blown over and in others, it hasn't even been blogged O.O Lolz But either way, I'm not gonna be blogging about Les Voix today. But instead, of something that I found out from Kenny.

These words perked my interest: 2 words FUCK THEM _l_

Wow, this was also accompanied by the sign too! Sure, these words are used in the everyday lives of those vulgar teens. But coming from Kenny himself was very surprising!

With those words was a link to a website. Getting curious, I decided to go to the link.

This was what I found:

BRITS IN SINGAPORE MOCK AGED RICKSHAW DRIVER AND SPARK ANGER OVER YOUTUBE CLIP

Three British tourists who mocked a 76-year-old rickshaw driver because he couldn't pedal fast enough for them - then posted a video of the struggling and panting old man on YouTube - have caused uproar in Singapore.

The trio also ran off without paying the £5 fare he requested and escaped in a taxi yelling expletives which were heard on YouTube as they filmed themselves leaving the scene at Clarke Quay, popular nightspot.

...

£5: about S$15
Expletives: "bad language" or profanities

Honestly, I'm shocked at what has happened. I honestly didn't know about this (yes, I have been living under a rock at the moment - stuck inside this 'wonderous' fantasy world lolz).

I have a couple of British friends, namely Cassy - who's living in Singapore at the moment and is a wonderful gal - and Miki - who's in London and like Cassy, kicks ass! They aren't rude nor will they mock anyone except for those who have irritated them - but even then, they aren't as rude as many people that I hhave seen around. In fact, so far my friends have heped me in all my annoying times. (Do not deny - my whining is being irritating, isn't it? Lolz)

But then again, the comments posted to this article doesn't show that they are rude. For example:

"I am lucky enough to have lived in Singapore and visit when I can...I have always been treated graciously and welcomed as a visitor. I am sorry that Singaporeans have had to witness a bunch of idiots, from the UK...It's a shame the local police didn't get hold of them, no soft policing there!" - Linda, UK

"I have worked in Singapore twice and can only apologise for this moron loutish behavious by absolute brain dead individuals.
This a prime example of everything that is wrong with Britain. Selfish, uncaring and he who shouts loudest wins not to mention the bully syndrome. If the situation was reversed the individuals involved would be crying for compensation for hurt feelings, race discrimination and Elf and Safety for being told to go faster. I am fast becoming ashamed to consider myself British." - Peter Working In China, Skelton in Cleveland, UK

and my most favourite:

"These blokes should be ashames of themselve. What goes around comes around. Wait till they are in their 70s." - Bjorn, SouthHampton, UK

It's good to know how concern everyone is being and how sorry the British is for a couple of their people are.

To Britain, thanks for apologising. I hope nothing comes of this. War is the last thing we need after everything that has happen.

To Singapore, do not judge them as a whole of what a couple of them have done. Those guys should receive punishment for THEIR own actions. Still maintain the peace. ^.^

I know this doesn't sound like "me" but I can't put in out in any other words.

For the whole article, the video and all the comments, please go to http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=490946&in_page_id=1770&in_page_id=1770&expand=true#StartComments

Thank you.

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Gokuroosama!

2007-11-03T18:29:00.000+08:00

Mood: Relieved...And Very Tired...Lolz

Music: Buses & Trains by Bachelor Girl

Hey People!

We finally did it! Les Voix was a success! Whew! It went off without any problems and I'm very happy. We worked hard for it and the roar of the audience during Les Voix was so...wow!

Here are some of the pictures of Les Voix and what happen during the concert:

Les Voix poster in black. ^.^ It's being pasted all around the school.

Les Voix poster in white. ^.^

The Les Voix tickets. I think they were made beautifully. ^.^

Yonghong looking cool! Lolz! Got it from Shuai Xun's flikr site ^.^

Aww...Shy Nick! Lolz also got it from Shuai Xun's flickr site ^.^

Wow, the guys are looking dashing in their suits, aren't they? And Mr. Ong is there too! Hahaz ^.^ From Shuai Xun's flickr site once again! ^.^

From Shi Pei's blog. Shi Pei herself, Winnie & Ping Ding making kissy faces! How cute! Lolz

Xuihui, Ping Ding and Fazilah. O.O What is Ping Ding doing? Tying Xuihui's ribbon of course! Hahaz! ^.^

My greedy self once again! Shi Pei took this! So embarassing! O//////O

It was a fun day, I admit. Memories will be kept from this and not to mention, the experience of this concert is one to remember forever. ^.^ Thanks to everyone who helped made this possible, especially our committee members and our very own president, Yi Tian.

I feel extremely bonded with VE, especially the girls (duh, considering I spent half the time with them). Found out secrets. Made rumors. BECOME one of the rumors. XP

It's fun playing along with the rumors. If you can't beat them, join them. So once again, apologises to SX for getting trapped in this. Like I said; if you can't beat them, join them. ^.^ Unless you are involved already, then we'll stop before your significant other comes and find me >.<>

I'll find more pictures from yesterday to put up ^.^ So keep coming back for updates!

Another note: This coming monday - there's no VE practice T.T I'll miss everyone! I'm so used to seeing them practically everyday! I know that I sound like I'll never see them again but *shrugs* you'd never know! Hahaz Okok, thanks to everyone again and to those who came to support us!

Specifically on my side: Andee, Joan, SK, Jeslin, Mira, Izzy and Memme! Muacks! Love you guys! Those who shouted out my name - thanks also! Lolz so embarassing! >/////<

Always Synyster,

Leandra

...Step Into The Dark Abyss...

2007-11-01T12:32:00.001+08:00

Mood: Having A Headache...>.<
Music: None T.T (Listening to Lecturer Ng Joo Kee - half-heartedly)

Tomorrow's the day.
My voice ensemble concert.
Les Voix.
7.30pm.
Nanyang Polytechnic's Theatre For the Arts.

I know I haven't been promoting much about it but so many things have been on my mind that I guess I really needed to say more about them. SORRY VE! >.<

Anyway, I have decided to stop brooding over my "problems" and focus on Les Voix for the moment. Actually, I have decided that quite some time ago already but I haven't got around to saying it since my mind keeps on straying back to them.

Besides, instead of feeling hurt over Drake's indecisiveness (is what I should call it? more like...uh...actually I don't know how to explain but that seems like a good word to put in at the moment so let's stick with that! ^.^), I'll lament over the untimely hugs given from Kris, the support from my friends and the "bonding" and "learning" I've been doing from everyday practices in preparation for Les Voix.

^.^

But a quick update:
Drake knows about me liking him.
Someone told me that being with Drake wouldn't be a good idea since he might stray me away.
It's been cleared that I'm not being avoided nor is there any problems between my friends.
I've decided to join DanceWorks 2008, despite the obvious 'problems' that might arise in the process - like time, juggling between CCAs, school and other things. But it's a learning step that I have to overcome.

Yup, so nothing is happening at the moment. Since school started two weeks ago, I have finally been well enough to go to school on Wednesday and Thursday (yes, today too). It's really weird because today is like my first time having lessons with other classes (not my own). I don't know anyone around but I'll survive.

It's better anyway *shrugs* I don't have anyone to distract me during lessons and I might actually pay attention in class. Keyword: Might. Lolz nah, I'll do my best this semester.

But anyway, I don't have much to say. I had a couple of days back but now, it's pretty much cleared up already so...GANBATTE V.E! Do our best for Les Voix!

Those who want tickets, tell me. You still can get them...I think...>.< I'll try my best! Um...if you have my number, all the better! Gimme a call! If not, tonight, I'll check back in my tagbox. Leave a tag there so I'll know if you want. State your name and the number of tickets you want. Uh...better yet, send me an email. Your name, the number of tickets that you want and your number, in case I don't have them too. So I'll get back to you ASAP. ^.^

Thanks and please do come and support us! It's a little glam so the dress code is formal-casual. ^.^ I think so since the choir members are dressed up in the first half. ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

...Lost In The Sea Of Depression...

2007-10-25T20:21:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

I'm really sorry but I think the next few posts will be kinda depressing. I understand that if you guys don't wanna read it. Just bear with me. *bows*

The update now is that I've come to terms that Kris won't like me and just treats me as a friend or a little sister. I don't mind. Because...I'm sad to report that Drake has been clouding my mind.

I've known him for awhile and he's affecting me so much. I keep getting pissed off at Drake and I don't know why!!! Maybe it's because he's so fucking clueless!!! (Please excuse my use of profanities at the moment *bows*)

Well, I'm also so confused with his actions! I just...ARGH!!! *tugs on pigtails*

I hate him.
I hate him for making me feel this way about him.
I hate how he crawls into my mind.
I hate how every actions he does is so adorable to me.
I hate how his voice reaches my ears and sends shivers down my spine.
I hate how he says my name.
I hate how he plague my dreams at night.
I hate him...

ARGH! Even the inner voice in my mind is telling me, 'Come on, you know that's not true. You like him. L. I. K. E. LIKE.'

Fine! You happy?

I like him.
I like the butterflies I feel whenever he's around.
I like the memories we make, even better, with the friends I have around.
I like the every little action that he does.
I like his voice and love the shivers that crawls all over my body.
I LOVE how he says my name, or rather, nickname.
I like that he appears in my dreams at night.
I like him...

I wanna confess to him actually but I'm afraid of what he will say. He's not coming this sunday. I'm VERY sad about that. If he doesn't come, then I have to tell him by phone. Which is actually much better but it'll KILL me if he doesn't call back or something.

If not, I'll write him an email now and tell it to him. I wanna tell him to think about it really carefully and to try and come on sunday so that he can give me an answer.

What if it's a rejection? I'll totally ruin the mood for the others. Maybe if he rejects me, I'll just go home so I don't have to affect the others too.

ARGH! I seriously don't know what to do...Help me...Please...

Always Synyster,
Leandra

You're Irritating Me, You Know That?
Do You Wanna Know Why?
Because I Can't Get You Out Of My Mind.

...Emo Shit...

2007-10-22T22:54:00.000+08:00

Mood: Pissed/Worried/Depressed/Confused
Music: Apologize by Timbaland feat. One Republic

Yup...

I was feeling kinda all right today until I got home. Certain friends of mine have gotten into a predicament. Other than that - I'm very confused. Another HIM have caught my eye. Now I'm in deep shit.

I don't even know why should I think so much over this. I don't even know why I should be worrying so much over this. I mean, it's not like ANYONE of them would EVER like me. Yeap, this might an emo post. Sorry but if you guys don't like to read emo shit, then you can ignore this post. I just really wanna get it out.

Okay, the first HIM is...let's call him Kris.
The second HIM will be...Drake.
Note: These names are completely made up. But the people behind the names are real.

I haven't been talkin to Kris online for quite awhile. I tried to but I never get a response. Recently, I saw him as I was leaving. He gave me a hug and that was it.

When Drake came in, my mind was finally off Kris. I felt free in a sense since Kris has been clouding my mind since I met him. My heart would tie up in knots and butterflies would flutter delicately whenever I think of him. A friend of mine told me to give up on Kris because he's been affecting me so.

I love talking to Kris. He makes me laugh. He makes me stop and think about myself. His hugs are addicting. Every conversation we had would replay in my mind like a movie. But all this is online. AND ONLY ONLINE. In person, we would share a joke or two. We would playfully chat. But our online conversations are much more than the ones in person.

Drake came in JUST recently. He's playful and oh-so-adorable. He's the first to compliment me and whatever comes out of his mouth, seems sincere. Even when he points out something bad, it doesn't seem like he minds it. I do become aware of it but I doesn't depress me to the point that I hate myself again because of it. Seriously, he brings out the playful me. I'm not shy. I'm not afraid of what others will think. Together with my friends, all of them bring out the playful me. And I don't actually regret it. I've come to like it.

The thing both of them have in common? They can cause confusion in me. Kris's actions have more than one explanation behind them. It can either be: He likes me or He knows and he's freaked out by it. Drake's actions just make you wonder: He's just playing with me. He'll never like me. (Or maybe that's my low self-confidence talking)

I hate it. I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling so depressed. I think that my heart is suicidal. It loves making itself fall for others and likes the feeling of pain and hurt whenever my inner self tells it that no one will ever like me because of my size, my looks, etc.

Nobody's perfect.
To the world you may be one person but to one person, you may be the world.
Soon, it'll be your turn to love.

How many times have I heard this? How many times have these words been through my head but never to reach my heart? Even if it does, it does for a while before being conquered by my low self-esteem.

Today, Drake isn't feeling himself. I understand totally. But I can't help but feel sad by it. I guess I'm not used to him feeling this way. I did see Kris today though. But for a fleeting moment. My heart just yearned for a hug from him. But I didn't get it. But it didn't bother me so much.

Drake is a different matter. He kinda blew me off today but I understand. But I feel really sad. Not only for me but for him too. I understood why he felt that way. I know but...*sighs* Sorry people who actually wanted to read this but I don't really know how to explain why exactly am I feeling this way.

My heart feels heavy and I've gone back to the sea of depression. I'm terribly sorry to those who are and will be affected by this. I hope tomorrow (or rather today since it's 12:01am right now) will be a better day.

I'm stopping this post for the moment. My emotions aren't allowing me to type properly. I'm sorry.

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Bad Day...Or Not...?

2007-10-19T18:44:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

Had really up and down days. Let's start with friday!

It isn't really a bad day but it's more like a semi-good day turned bad. Let's see what happened...Firstly, I came to class. Late. Not to much like Tuesday but still, I HATE BEING LATE >.<

Ever since school started, my time estimation is totally WRONG! I don't know what happened but I keep on missing the bus and have to wait like another 15 minutes for the next bus to arrive. And the best thing? If one bus is late, the other will be late and I DEFINITELY will be late for class.

After that, I went to meet with Izyani during my SIX-hour "break". We went to get my mp3 (YAY! FINALLY, it's fixed! ^.^) and we hanged around and stuff. After that, I was seriously dreading to go for my last class. It was a YEAR TWO module. You must be thinking: Why in the world am I, a Year One, taking a Year Two module? Well, there was SOME mix-up or whatever (I'm too lazy to explain it) and I'm stuck in that class.

Firstly, I went to the WRONG frickin' class. IT WAS SO EMBARASSING! *blushes* Anyway, when I went to the RIGHT class, everyone knew each other (DUH!) and I felt really awkward there. I didn't have my book yet because I haven't bought them so I borrowed the book from the Class Manager.

Surprisingly, I kinda understood what we were supposed to do so I could do the assignment to a certain extent. Which is not bad for someone who, ONLY this semester starting learning how to use Visual Studio 2005 and have to start on it in Year Two already.

After that, I met up with Ray (He was in the next class - the class that I went into wrongly) and we went for FB. I tried to catch on but unfortunately, I can only remember three-quarters of the whole dance right now. So I gotta ask someone for help again. The seniors had a 'talk' with us about our attitude and I guess I can understand how they're feeling. I mean, they put in everything for us and we still haven't given much yet.

So...

GANBATTE EVERYONE!

On Saturday, I was woken up by my dearest Mira Kitty who asked if I wanted to go out. I was like O.o? Uh...Okay...But only if they came to Pasir Ris. And they did. All four of them. Specifically Mira, Danial K., Daniel H., and Hafiz. These people, I must say, are an interesting bunch.

Halfway through, we went to Izyani's place and just like hanged out. It was really fun! On the bus there, Mira told me to tease Daniel H. and I did. LOLZ! It was so fun! I kept doing that the whole time and he played along too! ^.^ The best part of going to Izyani's place besides seeing Izyani herself, is that I got to see Maisarah and Panda! THEY WERE BOTH SO CUTE!

For you people who don't know, Maisarah is Izyani's neice and Panda is Izyani's cat.

Today, all of us met at Pasir Ris MRT station (besides Danial K. and Izyani who had something on) at noon. The guys were late - DUH! =.= And we bought lunch and headed over to my place. Daniel H. called me his mermaid! =.= why? Because my long skirt made me look like a mermaid. He said I was a cute mermaid. I was like O.o Oh...kay...? but thanks...Lolz

When we went over to my place, everyone just hanged out in the living room because my mum and bro slept in my room. DAMN! I wanted them to hang in my room instead. =.= Anyway, we played Truth Or Dare for a short while. Don't ask. I'm kinda obsessed with that game because of all the possibilities of dares that can come to mind.

For example, Mira dared me to seduce Daniel H. I did it. LOLZ! Then she dared him to seduce me back. =.= That boy needs some lessons. He was doing SOMEWHAT great. So I'll give him props for his 'work' LOL!

Anyway, it was pretty fun! ^.^ I kept on ignoring Daniel H. because he was being frickin' mean! He deserved it and I did some...stuff to him too! For revenge...*insert evil laughter* Mira encouraged me so I did! Hehe ^.^

They left about a couple of hours ago to meet up with Adith, who just came back from Indonesia. *sighs* I wanted to welcome him back too but I can't. My mum will KILL me and I have school tomorrow (even though it starts at 3pm =.=).

Ah well, I hope that during the weekday or next Saturday, we can all meet up again! ^.^ I can't wait to have this much fun again! Lolz!

Love ya people! *muackz*

Always Synyster,
Leandra

If Only I Could Stay Asleep, At Least I Could Pretend You're Thinking Of Me

2007-10-16T21:35:00.000+08:00

Mood: Tired, Unwell & Feeling That Something's Missing...
Music: Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Hey People!

Two days into the starting of school and ending of the holidays already and I'm very much tired. And get this - I don't have THAT much classes. But I still have the CCAs and everything.

Oh last week during FBodz, we were asked to wear our Secondary School Uniform/PE shirt. So practically everyone turned up in what they were supposed to wear. It was such interesting to see everyone in PE shirts or uniform. We learnt the girls'/guys' dance like normal but we didn't have a showcase!

You know what they wanted to do? A CATWALK! Fashioning our clothing Lolz! It was way cool! I got paired up with Trisha who's really adorable and a GREAT dancer! Both of us walked towards the camera and posed. When I turned to walked away, she slapped my butt! LOLZ! Then later she called me 'cute butt' Lolz!

The funniest was when Peng and Fong came up. Fong was dressed in his school uniform from head to toe and a cap. Peng had on his PE shirt and his pants was pulled up high in a dorky fashion. Both of them just walked up to the camera and like stood there. Then they turned to each other and Peng slapped Fong (playfully, of course) before walking away. Here's the most ADORABLE part: Fong looked like he was gonna cry and he was so cute! Lol

Everyone did their turn on the 'catwalk' and it was very interesting! ^.^

When school started on Monday, I was kinda panicking. First Day Panicks. Lolz...my classes started at 3pm, ended at 6pm (actually, 5pm because the teacher decided to let us off early) and I had VE at 7pm. VE was very interesting! But unfortunately, I had to leave at 8.30pm because I've been coming home late from school (yes, during the holidays) and my mum could see that I was seriously sleep-deprived so she set a new curfew for me - be home by 10pm, if possible.

Today was all right I guess. We started at 8am and was SUPPOSED to end at 3pm. Turns out that our last class lecturer didn't come so we were let off at like 1.15pm or sumthing like that.

Shih Yann (wow, it's been so long since I wrote her name in my blog Lolz) went off to meet her friend and Li Ying wanted to meet up with her boy but he wanted to meet at 4pm so she didn't. Instead, she followed me to Toa Payoh MRT to meet up with Mira and Hafiz.

Hafiz was late. Like ONE HOUR late.

The purpose of the meeting was to help Mira find a Halloween costume - a prom dress. We painstakingly walked to the shop which was quite a distant away from Doby Ghaut MRT station. My legs screamed for help since my ankle haven't healed; my knee started giving me problems and on the whole, it hurt. And guess what?

The shop was closed.

Here's how it went:

All four: *happily talking*
Mira: *skips to the shop and stop short, staring at the door*
Hafiz: *follows, stares at the door and laughs*
Li Ying: *follows and just stares blankly* (she was rather slow today)
Me: (oh, this is the best) *stares at the door sign* CLOSED *walks to the glass window nearby and proceeds to bang head against the door* Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang.
Mira: What the hell? Today is not a public holiday and the sign says it closes at 7pm! It's 5plus!
Hafiz: Oh shit, Leandra's getting pissed. *walks FAR away*
Me: *stares and smirks* This isn't my most pissed so you don't have to get worried.

So we found a place to sit down. We hanged around that bench 'cause we were tired and wanted to enjoy the aircon. When we were about to leave...

FLASHBACK
Four of us: *stares at the outside* Shit, it's raining. Heavily.
END FLASHBACK

...WHAT THE HELL!!! Li Ying was lucky because she had a straight bus back home. Mira, Hafiz and I walked in the rain. Okay, Hafiz did while Mira and I shared a pathetic umbrella. But honestly, I don't mind getting sick (which I think I did XP) since tomorrow's lessons is only TWO hours. My bus ride back and forth is THREE hours. What the hell...

And VE's at 3pm. I end at 10am. What am I gonna do for FIVE HOURS? O.O The earliest person that ends is Winnie - at 12pm. Haiz...

Ah well, it's around 10pm now. After maybe another half an hour of playing SIMS 2, I'll get to bed. I'm really shacked.

On another note, *wails* I haven't talked to him yet! *sighs* I guess he's busy with school. I feel bad to bother him but I still kinda did...But no response yet >.< Lolz...It's fine - I'll live...I hope Lolz!

Here's a poem I found (yes, I have nothing better to do =.=):

I'm not myself
I'm not the same
Things set me off
The wind whispers his name
The slightest thing makes me think of you
Oh how I wish you knew

Alright then! Thanks for reading! Tag if you like! ^.^ And to Stranger: where are you? I'm still curious but if you wish to keep your identity, then it's fine with me ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

The Video Is Out!

2007-10-07T22:18:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

I don't know if any of ya wanna watch our performance but here is the video! ^.^ My dearest Nora from the group Decades, took the video! YOU'RE THE BEST NORA!

This is the first set that we did. I spot so many errors from me! *blush*

Thanks again to Nora darling for taking the video. Muacks!

Oh yeah, I'm starting to go and exercise with my friends. To lose lotsa weight (as you can tell from the video, I definitely need to lol) so please, encourage me! ^.^ Hahaz, okay I'm not forcing you but yeah...uh...nevermind (I don't know what to say Lol)

ANYWAY, I'm doing this to help myself not because of someone else though that someone else did promise me something LOL :P But yeah, I hope I make it! ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Yeah! WE DID IT!

2007-10-06T16:07:00.000+08:00

Mood: Extremely High But...*pouts* I Didn't Get To Hug Him >.< (lol)
Music: Let Me Love You by Mario

Hey People! ^.^ Just had the FB Juniors Dance Exam 2007 yesterday and I'm so relieved that it's over but I'm also so sad that I won't see my group, known as the Ten-Thirties, as much as before. Okay, the reason for the chosen name is that our group meet at 10:30am EVERY MORNING since they announced the groupings. Hahaz

How was the dance exam, you ask? WE DID IT! TEN-THIRTIES GOT FIRST!!! *insert evil laughter* MUWHAHAHAHAHA! Haha, nah...I think everyone did great. I'm so happy and relieved. After all the frustration and pain that not only me, but everyone else has felt, we did our best and it felt great to put in my hard work in that few minutes.

To know that we come out tops was even better. Okay, I would like to thank EVERYONE who stood by me and encouraged me throughout everything. Before the set started, everyone was like 'Go Leandra!' Embarassing (since I've never been encouraged like that before) but thank you! ^.^

Andee: Thanks for being the great leader that you are. I know that you meant well when you were shouting. In the end, we did it. ^.^ Congrats for getting in the Student Union Performance! Good luck!

Joan: Crazy and cool chick! Yet very much professional. You know when to be strict and when to have fun. Thank you! ^.^ Congrats to you too for getting in the Student Union Performance! Good luck to you too!

Esh: I love talking to you about everything! You're so cool and I'm happy we shared the same views in certain things. Thank you...^.^

Chao Zhong: Love your crappy jokes! Haha You helped us in every way that you can. Thank you for everything! Improve your english! Hahaz just kidding ^.^

Thiri: We did it! We improved and that was what that matters! We rock! Lolz ^.^

This is our group, Ten-Thirties! The day before the exams when we were practicing on our act! I had fun you guys!

Ten-Thirties' GANGSTA side! Perfect for our act! Hahaz

This is the black team; me, Andee and Esh! Or rather, red...Um, black bandanas and red hoodies was what we were wearing! ^.^ The other team was the red, uh...grey team...? ANYWAY, their members were Thiri, Chao Zhong and Joan!

Me and Andee! Okay, there wasn't anything ACTUALLY sticking out =.= but it looked...wrong, okay? I got this picture from his Livejournal so he did the editing Lolz

This is Ten-Thirties after we did the showcase, listening to the seniors about their comments. So scary...>.<>

Ten-Thirties...*grins widely*

The bond between us; a bond created through dance! ^.^

There! I got these pictures from Andee's Livejournal so I'll get more pictures and post them up!

Here's my sappy/emo quote(s) for the day:

"I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi, or even smile because I know, even if it's just for a second, I crossed your mind."

"When you love someone and they don't love you back, it's hard to find a way to keep yourself on track. It leaves you broken hearted and hurts so much. I guess that's why they call it a crush."

And my favourtie sappy quote...

"I'm such a sucker for those eyes,
They permanently paralyze.
You got my heart under attack.
You give me shivers down my back.
Do you have to walk the way you do?
I get weak just watching you."

Aww....so sweet! Lol All right then, I'm gonna get outta here now.

Oh yeah! To Stranger in my comment box, TELL ME WHO YOU ARE!...Please? *pouts* Lolz I'm so very curious! ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

There Are Many Things I Like To Say To You But I Don't Know How...

2007-10-03T22:37:00.000+08:00

Mood: Missing Him...*sighs* And My Other Friends...
Music: Crazy Over You by 112

Hey People,

I'm FINALLY back from 3 days 2 nights Voice Ensemble Les Voix Camp! ^.^ It was really fun and very tiring since it's not a get-to-know-each-other-more camp but instead a concert training camp. Here's a brief run-through of the camp:

Day 1
We met at 8.30am and started out with some ice-breaker games. Two only and been used in many camps before. But it was still very fun. First was trying to squeeze all your members into a small square which gets smaller each round. The second game was Human Entanglement. None of the groups won because at every turn, cross over, cross under, etc that we did caused more and more knots between members Lol.

Practice came and it was as usual. Mr. Ong came in the afternoon. After practice, I went off to dance practice where learnt about 1/2-8 of the second choreography before making ''rounds'' to other groups. Okay, I only went to Yismin's team but I love the members there! ^.^

Had a ''chat'' with Yismin about him. She's really sweet, trying to help me and all that. THANKS YISMIN! ^.^ Went back after that to do some choreography for the songs. Um...this is for VE, not FB Hahaz...I felt rather embarassed because the steps were like...uh I don't know. I guess I was used to dancing hip-hop steps but the VE choreo wasn't hard to catch. =.= duh...But I guess after getting used to it, the steps look rather cute ^.^

Then lights out was at 11pm but Sheryl, SuEe (who were both sleeping next to me) and I stayed until 1am before turning in. We chatted abit. Both girls teasing me about him. Hahaz and talked about...what else? Cute guys Hahaz...Hey, we ARE girls after all.

Day 2
Woke up in a daze. Did morning PT, known to VE as the 5BX. Wow, just ONE round around the track caused me to be EXTREMELY short of breath. Believe me, I sounded like I was having asthma. You can ask Sheryl hahaz. She was nice enough to lag behind and urge me on to finish the round. THANKS SHERYL! ^.^

After that, went off to dance practice where Andee, Esh and I practiced our part. ^.^ I walked around to...where else? Yismin's group again. Talked to her about her interesting love life ^.^ Halfway through, I went back to continue dancing before the girls from VE came and told me to go and change for a photoshoot. I was like 'SHIT!' and ran off to change, THINKING that I was late.

Then I realised that everyone had to wait until Mr. Ong arrived. =.= I was like WTH...I have to dance in my 'formal wear' O.O So I did a little. Then, VE came and told me to go for the photoshoot. I said bye to my group before going off with Hazel (she had to go back for her attachment at Cheers).

The photoshoot was all right, I guess. In one of the candid shots, I 'kissed' Li Dan (whom Sheryl and I named 'Pretty Eyes' because her eyes are REALLY pretty ^.^). It was very fun.

We went back to start the workshop. Two conductors came with Mr. Ong - Ms. Fanny Low (soprano) and Mr. Wilson Goh (tenor). So Ms. Low took us girls while the guys went next door with Mr. Goh. Mr. Ong stayed with the girls and helped out in playing the piano for awhile. ^.^

Ms. Low really taught us many things. I felt really bad because I couldn't sing well due to a sore throat and cough. It was pretty bad. One good thing about this workshop was that Altos weren't always the ''problem''. Hahaz. Nah, but seriously, I learnt so much.
Raise your soft palette
Inner smile
Breathe down
Facial expressions
Sing over the imaginary line
Pronouce the vowels
Focus the vowels to the center
Support your notes

Yup, so this workshop really helped alot. I hope I can remember to do EVERYTHING properly.

Met up with Yismin and was feeling 'emo' because wasn't so close to him that day. Turns out that he was...uh, I can't say because it would totally give away but Yismin reassured me that it wasn't my fault.

Played some games. First was Twister. I can't remember who won but it was SO PAINFUL! >.< I think it was Cai Yun. She battled it out with Emily. Lol Then we decided to play 'Bomberman', where those in the horizontal or vertical row of the 'bomber' loses. We paired up (I was with Cai Yun) and I can't remember who won the first round. Then we named each person 1 or 2 in the pair. Cai Yun was 1 and I, 2.

The 1s went first and I think Ben won. He was against...Shuai Xun, I think. Tenor senior against Tenor junior. Senior won. Hahaz Then the 2s played and Joyce and I were the last two. This time, Alto senior against Alto junior. Senior won. I WAS SO CLOSE! Hahaz

When we were all relaxing after that, I taught the girls some dance moves. The body wave and the krunk. Winnie could do the body wave! Cool! Then some girls and I peeked into the guys bunk. It was messy but looked oddly...nice...? O.o

I saw Shuai Xun's shoes (which I totally LOVE), and decided to 'borrow' it. Hahaz.

After that, I borrowed Li Fen's laptop and logged online to check out my email and all that. Chatted with Shuai Xun who was online and in the next room only Hahaz. He was so nice online and I felt guilty for 'borrowing' his shoes. Then I told him. Turns out that he didn't even realised! Which means, if I hadn't told him about it, I would have brought home a new pair of rockin' sneakers! *snaps fingers* Damn! Hahaz... I still felt guilty and apologized to him. I do still feel guilty now so SORRY SHUAI XUN! >.<

After that was Evaluation and Debrief and all that. We took lotsa group pictures. It was really fun. I'll try to get them and put them up! ^.^

Was supposed to go for dance practice after that but something happened that prevented me from doing anything. The guys were nice enough to tell me to go home and rest since even if I stayed there, I couldn't do anything so there was no point.

I took a cab back because I was SOOOOO tired and in pain. Body aches here and there and the stiff neck is...*pressed lightly on neck* OW! >.< Still painful...

Tomorrow is gonna be a VERY tiring and busy day since we have so much to cover and I really have to work and learn everything, not to mention syncronizing with the others and the...uh...I can't give away so...there are still other stuff we have to do.

*sighs* It's getting pretty late so I guess I had better get some sleep for tomorrow.

But before I go, here are some quotes and poems I found and felt like writing it out:

I see him
But he sees past me
I look in his eyes
But he looks around me
Does he know what I see
When he stares through me?
I see him
And I can't help watching him
Not watching me

Because I like you and I know you don't know it
I like you so much, I talk to everyone but you
And I wonder, what would you think of this little number
Yeah, I wonder, what you would say if you knew

Should I hesitate as I speak
Please don't think I'm preoccupied (not that you would notice)
For words don't come easily
When one really cares
And too often I evaluate each word
Trying to be anyone but myself
And the fear of rejection
Brings confusion
The confusion brings silence
And my heart prays that you might hear my silence
And understand

I'm scared
So afraid to show I care
Will he think me weak
If I tremble when I speak
Ooh what if
There's another one he's thinking of
Maybe he's in love
I'd feel like a food
Life can be so cruel
I don't know what to do

There! I know that it's rather mushy and emo-ish. I'm really sorry if you guys don't like it. It's pretty much what I feel in a rather poetic sense I guess. Hahaz but yeah...

Oh! I found this two sentence which was really true, from my experience in helping others in love Hahaz It's:

Too many of us stay walled because we are afraid of being hurt; we are afraid to care too much, fear that the other person does not care at all.

I'm afraid to tell you who I am, because if I tell you who I am, you may not like who I am, and its all that I have.

IT'S SO TRUE, ISN'T IT? If you don't understand, you can come and ask me ^.^ If you do, then think about it.

Many of us are afraid to tell our true feelings. Everyday, we plaster on a mask and carrying the other masks around with us for different times on different days with different groups of people. Why? Because the world stereotypes. No matter how much you say you don't, to a certain extent, you do.

Because it's human nature. You can't possibly love everyone and everyone can't possibly love you. There will be someone that you feel unsure about. There will be someone that feels unsure about YOU. Everyone can't please us and we certainly can't please everyone.

I guess this ''human nature'' is what holds us back in certain points of life. Don't you ever wonder? If I did this, will the outcome be better or worse? If I studied with them, I might be able to get better results! If I was friends with him/her, he/she might be the friend to remember and to keep! If I told him/her how I felt, we might be together!

That's a whole lot of thinking but I'm not asking you to sit down and ponder it. But let your mind say what it wants to to you. Listen to your heart; your mind; your soul. Never shush it for you might end up becoming someone which is the total opposite of how you really truly are.

Don't let what you think that others might say about you affect your decision unless it's a group one. If it is a group decision, then like the name say, decide AS A GROUP. But if it affects you and only you, listen to yourself.

Hahaz, I can say all this but why am I still holding back on telling him? Because words are easier said than done. Love is different, I guess. It takes time. One has to be patient but...sooner or later, you have to say it out. Better sooner or else, all the 'if i did this...' possibilities might come to mind. But use your common sense too. Love does not only affect you. It affects the ones you love too.

It's really complicated but if you wanna indulge in this subject further, please feel free to come and speak to me. I'll be more than happy to try and answer your questions. ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

...Happenings...

2007-09-26T21:44:00.000+08:00

Mood: Shacked -o-
Music: We Belong Together by Big Bang [They're not bad y'know...for an Asian band since I don't listen to Asian music much]

Hey people,

Yes, sorry to inform y'all that I'm still alive...I'm kinda surprised though...I'm really tired...Why? Well, dance exams are around the corner (next friday, in fact) and I've got a Voice Ensemble Performance, known as Les Voix, on November 2nd I think. Yes, it IS on Izyani birthday >.<

Even though it's the holidays, I've been going back to school EVERYDAY - mainly to practice for dance and choir practices because...well, we all know I ain't the best dancer or singer. Lol

It's been really stressful because I just can't seem to get the steps right. At all. It really sucks. For choir, it's pretty easy because even though I haven't got the time or energy to practice at home, once I'm in school and starts singing, I'll catch up I guess. For dance, I really got to get it down but it'll look damn sucky if I don't.

Last week, I felt really down because I wasn't confident of myself. AT ALL. With a little (okay, ALOT) of help from some friends of mine and my dance team, I'm a little more confident of myself so...thanks to them! ^.^

But lately >.< I admit that my confidence have been faltering ever so much. Just yesterday, we've been drilling into ourselves the dance steps. And I can't get it. My team mates (or rather mate) have been like rather harsh...and I have to admit that I'm very scared...I just can't seem to get it at all!!! ARGH!!! *tugs on pigtails* It's so frustrating!

I've been practicing and I really felt like I wanna cry...But because of my pride, I didn't...Until I went home >.< T.T I just felt so hopeless! My feet was so awkward. My body was screaming and pain was tearing through it (I know this sounds damn dramatic but that's how it feels okay?). And I cried till I fainted - Hehe *grins nervously*

I know! I'm stressed! Yes, I can tell the damn signs! But it's not only that...I didn't eat - Hehe *grins nervously again* I'm fasting okay? I still drink and maybe I do eat alittle - like when the other girls eat. I guess my body can't take it. But I'm fasting because well, it's a good opportunity to lose weight and I guess I wanna feel how it is that the malays can survive every year like this. Kudos to them!

I'm not changing my patterns. I guess I'm just gonna strive for this for maybe another week or so. The dance exams are next friday. I'll have to survive till then. And after that, I hope everything's more relaxed I guess.

I gotta go now. I gotta get to school tomorrow for dance. I'll be in school from 10.30am to 10pm. 7pm to 10pm I have Voice Ensemble. >.< But before I get some sleep, I'll cry one more time to clear my head (and heart Hahaz) for the days ahead 'cause from tomorrow onwards, I might not have enough time to cry (wow, that sounds so dramatic Lol).

Ganbatte!

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Walk by Avenged Sevenfold

2007-09-15T23:19:00.000+08:00

Hey people!

This whole background and song and practically everything here is dedicated to my kitty babe, Mira! (She's a real human being and not a cat for those idiots out there =.= ) and my Onee-sama, Izyani!

Hey babe (Mira),

whatever happens, happens for a reason. All you need to know is that Cassy-wolf and mousey-me are behind you all the way. ^.^ And Adith too ^.^

Even though I met you awhile ago...
Even though you kinda scared me when I first met you...
Know that I'll be there for ya!

You totally brought a new light to me - you and Cassy! ^.^ And I'll never forget that. For all that you guys tried to do (like going up to random guys to ask for their numbers just for me), I thank you so this is kinda a thanks.

It's also a 'keep ur chin up!' There are others out there who love you for you...I know it's overrated and cliche...Even -I- get tired of that line but there is a part of me that believes that and you should you.

NEVER let anybody, especially just a GUY, get you down. Weren't you the one who told me "Screw what other people think!"? ^.^

You're awesome, beautiful and all-round FUCKING COOL! Don't even forget that! And I'm not saying that just 'cause I'm your friend. I'm saying it because it's the TRUTH and you, Cassy, Adith and all your other friends know it, girl! ^.^

Chin up and we'll make this day a frickin' party!! Hahahahah!

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Hey Onee-sama (Izyani),

I know you're feeling all depressed. Chin up, now you're having holidays and so am I. We'll do the stuff like making those chocolates and shit! Hahaha ^.^

Anyway, you've always been there for me so it's kinda my turn. So anything, give me a holler and I'll be there to lend a listening ear or whatever ^.^

Always Synyster,
Leandra

Here's something for everyone who's suffering because of a bitch or bastard in their life that has kept them from moving on and enjoying life. It's the meaningful song lyrics of 'Walk' by Avenged Sevenfold

Can't you see I'm easily bothered by persistence
One step from lashing out at you...
You want in to get under my skin
And call yourself a friend
I've got more friends like you
What do I do?

Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been belong
You can't be something you're not
Be yourself, by yourself
Stay away from me
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time

Respect, walk
What did you say?
Respect, walk
Are you talking to me?

Are you talking to me?

Run your mouth when I'm not around
It's easy to achieve
You cry to weak friends that sympathize
Can you hear the violins playing your song?
Those same friends tell me your every word

Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been belong
You can't be something you're not
Be yourself, by yourself
Stay away from me
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time

Respect, walk
What did you say?
Respect, walk
Are you talking to me?

Respect, walk
What did you say?
Respect, walk
Are you talking to me?

Are you talking to me?
No way, punk!

Respect, walk
What did you say?
Respect, walk
Are you talking to me?

Respect, walk
What did you say?
Respect, walk
Are you talking to me?

Are you talkin to me?
Walk on home, boy

Alritey then! ^.^ Enjoy this song! Please, if you wanna listen to this song, ask me for it. Or buy their album. DO NOT DOWNLOAD THE SONG OR STEAL THE LYRICS! Because...*smiles sweetly* ...I'll make sure you'll not only get fined but also end up in jail for jeopardizing Avenged Sevenfold's sales. *eyes glint threatening, along with the knife in my hand*

SINGFEST ROCKS!

2007-08-16T15:00:00.000+08:00

Hello people in blogger-land!

I know its been a long time since I've updated and to tell the truth, I'm lazy hahaz! Anyway, I've overcome my laziness and decided to update JUST for you guys! Don't you see how great I am? *coughcough* Hahaz!

Anyway, it's been a REAL stressful week last week. I barely slept for 3-4 days. Yes, you heard me. From Monday to Wednesday, I had to wake up and go to school from 10am to 10pm for StageArts Annual Production. I only had a minor role but every part counts. Because it ends at 10pm, by the time I reach home, it was oh-say...midnight? Yup, around there.

And because tests were around the corner, I had to study so I didn't sleep much I guess. On Tuesday, I thought there was NO common test but found out one hour beforehand that I had one - MATHS! The very bane of my existence. Panicking, I flipped through and sat for the test. I really hope that I managed to JUST pass...Fat chance.

ANYWAY, on Wednesday, there was another test and in the evening, we did the Production. IT WAS A SUCCESS!!!

KUDOS TO THOSE WHO PUT IN SO MUCH EFFORT FOR THIS WHOLE PRODUCTION! THANKS EVERYONE!

I was really happy 'cause my mum manage to come for it and not to mention, Kenny and Nora!!! YAY!!!

Anyway, when I went home, I barely slept AGAIN because the next day I had to wake up at 4plus IN THE MORNING. And you thought the nightmare was over right? Yeah...

Why? BECAUSE THE NEXT DAY WAS SINGFEST '07!!! A 10-hour day concert featuring major rocking bands. It went in this order:
The Great Spy Experiment
One Buck Short
Crowned King
Cobra Starship
The Academy Is...
Gym Class Heroes
Avenged Sevenfold
MxPx
The Noisettes
Hinder
featuring the Eye Candy Twins (DJs - sorry, HOT TWINS DJs - from the UK) inbetween bands.
It was something in that order - I forgot hahaz!

Anyway, I woke up 4plus in the morning, changed, took a taxi, picked Izyani and my ticket. I was a fool - I left my pencil box when I rushed home the night before. And in that pencil box was my SINGFEST TICKET!!! I feel really bad for making Shavien wake up so early in the morning but her house was like REALLY deep inside and it took us another couple more bucks to find her T.T

When we got there, it was like 6am and we lined up. The concert starts at 1pm. We met new people - Jane, Eza, Nep and Zanne! They were cool! Also, there was this guy with an afro! COOL! He told us his name but I forgot because it was easier to call him 'Afro Guy' lolz! And another tall guy. We were the '6am Crew'!

Then around 11plus or 12noon, a van pulled up and guess who? THE ACADEMY IS... came out of that van!!! It took everyone some seconds to realise that yes, they were famous, and yes, they were gonna be playing later on. -.-" I rushed and took one pic before running back to my back to get some autographs.

I took whatever was in my bag and later realised that I had actually took my Database Fundamentals textbook and told them to sign for me. So now, my textbook can be worth hundreds! HAHAZ! I wanna tear out the front page, laminate it and hang it up nicely.

Here are some of the pics that the gals and I took:

This is Jack - the camera guy. He's REALLY nice and friendly and pretty cool. Maybe I should have gotten his autograph too. I mean, he DOES create TAITV for the fans hahaz. (for those who don't know what TAITV is - it's The Academy Is (TAI) own tv show where they feature the guys in different stuff every week! It's really fun to watch it! Check them out on YouTube. The username FueledByRamen has them! ^.^)

This is Ryland Blackinton from Cobra Starship. He's the guitarist and he's damn funny and cool! He came from the venue inside to come out to greet us!

I GOT HIS AUTOGRAPH! hahaz

THIS is my new obessession! Gabe Saporta from Cobra Starship! He's the lead singer and a sexy dancer! He completely seduces me during the band's play hahaz! I took a picture with him but it's with Eza at the moment. I haven't gotten around to catch her online. He rocks and sexes me up to the max! *swoons* hahaz!

I got his autograph too! He signed 'To Leandra, <3>

THIS, ladies and gentlemen, is my other new obessession! William Beckett from The Academy Is...He's SOOOOO sexy! If you got to see his hipbones, they're completely ORGASMIC!!! *swoons* I love him! Hahaz! He's really cool and when he was signing my textbook (lol), he talked to me. In that minute, I melted! LOLZ Here's how it went (it wasn't much but I'll remember it forever!):

William Beckett: *signing my textbook* So I'll see ya inside there? *looks up and smiles*

Me: *swoons* Y-yeah...*can't stop grinning*

William Beckett: Great! *smiles once again, handing me back my textbook*

Me: *swoons*

OMG!!! Lolz!

This is the picture I took before getting my textbook hahaz!

Don't worry ladies and gentlemen, I got the other members of TAI's signatures too! Adam T. Siska - Sisky Biz/Business; Mike Carden; Andy Mrotek - The Butcher; Michael Guy Chislett. YAY!!!

During Cobra Starship's set, Gabe sang 'Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)'...then, William came in and sang his part!!! OMG!!!

~Kiss me goodbye~ It was orgasmic! Gabe kissed him (on the cheek) but it was...*squeals* I LOVE IT!!! Then Sisky came in and rapped out Travis McCoy's (lead singer of Gym Class Heroes) part! IT WAS SO COOL! SISKY ROCKS!

The downfall? Just when Avenged Sevenfold came out, the STEEL barricade broke and I was right in front. I fell with the barricade, my legs got caught inbetween the bars and I was being trampled on. It was so scary...

I managed to get out with BIG and PAINFUL bruises and maybe something broken but that - I'm not sure. One of my biggest bruises is this:

I decided to make it small because some people might not like the sight of it. I'm so sorry. But yeah, its been a week and it still haven't faded off yet - not even the small ones.

The next day, I couldn't walk so I couldn't go for my test. I was really hoping because I wanted to show off my SingFest T-shirt! Hahaz! I bought it using Zanne's money. She was kind enough to lend me the $15 (who would to the person they just met that day? Hell, even my friends now wouldn't!) which I already returned ^.^

Pity I didn't have more money, I really wanted the cap too. *sigh* Anyway, now whenever I heard the opening of the 'Beast and the Harlot' from Avenged Sevenfold (which is, ironically, my favourite song hahaz), I get scared - my heart races as the memories of me being trampled over runs through my mind.

Hahaz! Anyway, weirdly enough, I want but don't want my bruises to go away. I mean, they are a reminder of me being in SingFest - as if the shirt wasn't enough hahaz!

I'll try and get more pictures up so keep checking back this blog! And comment too! See ya around kiddies! hahaz!

Ja ne,

Leandra

Written Yesterday ^.^

2007-07-14T17:06:00.000+08:00

I'm actually pretty lazy to think of something to write and pretty much feeling a tad bit emo right now so I'll post an entry from my 'diary'. I would sometimes write about my day on the way home. In there, it's actually much more personal but this isn't all that so here it is:

Friday, July 13, 2007

Start: 10.22PM

End: 11.02PM

Mood: Happy! ^.^

Place: On Bus 72, going home

Listening to: Passion by Se7en

It started as an okay day today. I mean, went to class, met up with Annu, ate at MacDonalds, went for more classes then went to Koufu with Madeleine and Hanisah to just…chill! Annu went home because she was um…tired. Yeah, let’s stick it with that.

At around 5pm, went to the dance studio with Hanisah to practice a little bit. We found some of the juniors and of course, the seniors, there already. We practiced like HELL because, well, TODAY IS THE DANCE EXAM!

During the stretching, AHH!!! SO PAINFUL!!! >.<>

I love our choreography! ^.^ The other groups were awesome! Felt rather high when they showcased their choreography. But when it came to our turn, oh ho ho ho! LOL I FELT SUPER SCARED! Not to mention, I didn’t eat earlier so the constant practicing was making me rather light-headed and dizzy. But I SURVIVED!

Out of the total score of 50, I got 26 only! T.T But at least I pass and I knew what was wrong with me. I didn’t show much expression (TRUE). I didn’t give much eye-contact (TRUE). My moves weren’t sharp or impactful (TRUE). Honestly, everything written there was true. LOL.

On the good side, I DIDN’T MOUTH MY COUNTING ANYMORE! YAY! ^.^ They said that my musicality was not bad – which means I somewhat had my groove and could flow to the music. I REMEMBERED ALL THE STEPS! ^.^ YAY!

This was what I found out when I talked to Eileen. However, talking to Shafeena made me realize something important. She pointed out that I didn’t have confidence.

I could pull practically ALL of the steps perfectly. She said that she saw my dancing – she said it looked great! BUT – because of my low confidence, I didn’t have expressions nor did I have any eye-contact.

The first thing I need to do is to work on my confidence and practically all of my other problems could be solved in no time!

But hearing that comment from Shafeena made me realize that I CAN dance! She said I could be SO much better if I was confident of myself.

So thanks to Shafeena and Eileen for making me realize! ^.^ I’ll work on them! ^.^

That’s pretty much my day! I still feel like dancing! LOL

Okay, I think my stop’s right around the corner!

Ja ne,

Leandra

Yup, that was my entry yesterday. I'm feeling pretty proud of myself but I REALLY need to work on my confidence. But I seriously love dancing. I shall work on my confidence! ^.^

But not right now >.< my whole body's in PAIN! I seriously overstretched myself so now it's pretty hard for me to move about. Oh well, *shrugs* I'll get over the pain.

About my ankle, *grins nervously, poking fingers together* hehe...I think I overused it since yesterday was the exam, I thought to..."Ah fuck it, I'll give the turn a shot." So brilliant me decided to do the turn during our last try (we had three tries - one facing the mirror and the other two facing the seniors). And now, my ankle hurts.

Inner Self: *sweatdrop* IDIOT! NOW WE'RE BOTH IN PAIN EVERYTIME WE WALK!

*glares at Inner Self* Shut up! It was an exam. Sacrifices need to be made to pass it. Besides, if we don't try now we might not be able to do it properly during performances or whatever.

Inner Self: *pouts* fine!

*glares, then turns back to audience, smiling* ANYWAY, I gotta go already. I don't entirely feel myself today. I'll check with everyone later!

Ja ne,
Leandra

Everything's Changing And I Feel Left Behind...

2007-07-05T23:47:00.001+08:00

Here's a food for thought:

The world's changing. Do you ever feel left behind?

Well, I'm talking to an old secondary school friend and I realised how much he and the others that I talk to have changed. They're all matured and where am I? I've grown down while others have grown up.

I remember my past - I was backboneless. People CONTROLLED me like a puppet, a lapdog. I sat there and did nothing about. Maybe some still do but it isn't as bad as the past. I put a stop to it. It ended badly. I cut off ties that linked to the problem. I thought I did a good thing. I've gained my backbone and I've started a new life.

These new friends brought me into a new light. They taught me FUN. Something I haven't felt when I was with my past problem. My past problem dragged me to bookshops after bookshops. I missed concerts, parties and well..FUN! I loved it. These new people didn't discriminate me. For the first time, I felt normal I guess.

I know I'm not deformed or whatever but all my life, (well, since school started) people always teased me because of my looks. And when I put a stop to my past problem, they used the worst kind of attack one can imagine. They knew my weakness - my heart, my emotions, my mind. They targeted it, telling me everything.

I made believe that I didn't care but actually, I do. But now, if they come and tell me, I'll tell them to go to hell.

When I'm with my new life, I forget everything. It's a new life. Why should I remember shit that happened to me? Why should I bring back the pain?

But having this conversation with this friend of mine, I realised that I was running away from my problems. Not that I needed to confront them but I pushed aside everything and started anew in the sense of the new person - new feelings, new experiences. It was like my past never happened and I was reborn this year.

I forgot that my past experiences built my character and my strength. The pain I felt should remind me how harsh reality is and not to fool around with life. Life is a delicate thing and Death jumps in at every corner. Self-mutilation...Suicide...These are all things that are not worthy when Life itself is priceless.

The reason for the title "Everything's Changing And I Feel Left Behind..." is that talking to this friend and a few more, I realised that everyone has matured so much. Where am I? I forgot everything that I've become childish!

My marks are horrible! I still didn't give a damn! CCAs, though important, seem like the MOST important thing when actually, its Studies that should ALWAYS come first. My money is spent on things which probably isn't important and could wait a few more years. And I'm not working to help out the family!!!

My mother is a SINGLE-parent trying to raise two TEENAGE kids, with the help of HER mother and sister. Why can I, the ELDEST teenage at the age where I am legally able to earn money, get a job and help out?

How are we to live when we are going to be in our new one-room flat? Electricity, water, internet, overall rent...my mother can't possible pay for EVERYTHING. I have to pay half. How am I able to do that when I can't even do a mature thing like get a job?

I really feel useless. Things aren't meant to be like this in my "new life". But things never go the way I hope, does it? Bad luck comes at every corner...No, its not bad luck. It is the way that -I- made it to be. I can't just sit and think that everything is going to be all right.

I made promises. I promised to be a better daughter; a better sister. I promised that I would work hard and pass my modules to get to the next level. I promised to be a better changed person - in my physical and mental attributes - to play my strengths and to work on my weakness.

I also wanted so much. I wanted to help my mother; to take away the suffering she has when it comes to money. I wanted to help my brother; to reach out and take his hand, guiding him and letting him know that his family will ALWAYS be around even though we're a broken family and soon, we'll be living far apart.

All these wants and I didn't do anything about it. I've lost the "family" connection with my brother already. Though we talk somethings, I, the older sister, actually feel degraded. What a hopeless case am I...

But then again, as my friend said, I'm half done. I've found out what is wrong with me. Now, I have to do something about it.

I have to work harder in my studies. I have to help out in anyway that I can. I have to plan my days properly so that I do not side-track and concentrate only on my CCAs - if all things fail, I have to quit one more CCA. Money doesn't grow on trees - no matter how I wish. I have to set aside for family; for the future; for emergencies and for school. Things that I want have to wait.

Sacrifices have to be made if I want to change yet AGAIN for the better. I don't want to go back to be an emo kid - the very emo kid that sat at home, wishing to die and crying her heart out.

Face the facts Leandra, if so what if guys don't like you for a relationship? NO ONE CARES! What matters is family and studies first. If you can get that down properly, then you can go and complain about no guy wanting to be in a relationship with you. In the meantime, PIPE DOWN and worry about the important things.

SET YOUR PRIORITIES RIGHT! Or it's back to the fucked-up emo shit-ass world again.

Thanks Alann, for reminding me the hardships I went through to gain the character that I have inside me. Thanks for unlocking it and making me realise the true meaning. Law really does suit you. Hope to see you on Teachers' Day in Siglap again.

Ja ne,
Leandra

CAMERA-WHORES!

2007-07-05T22:53:00.000+08:00

Hey!

Alot has happened but I'll just get up on the FIRST main thing. ^.^ WE CAM-WHORED YESTERDAY! ^.^ Take a look at the whacky pictures! Hahaz!

First Try! I love this picture the most because for once, all of us didn't have complaints about ourselves in the picture hahaz!

Kisses for Shih Yann AKA Aunty! We love you Aunty!

Annu's turn! Kisses for Annu! Eww! I look like a pig! Oink! Hahaz!

Li Ying trying to act tough! Shih Yann hiding! Annu's disgusted! And I'm laughing! Hahaz!

Looking away! Except for Li Ying. We were supposed to look away but Li Ying decided to look in front hahaz!

There are so much more pictures which we took! The rest weren't as nice. Oh, I took more actually but I will put them up when I have more time!

Leandra

New Look Part II

2007-07-02T17:33:00.001+08:00

Back,

After a full frickin' day of trying very hard to get the connection in NYP, I have finally suceeded *breathes out a sigh of relief* Stupid connection...stupid laptop...

Apparently, Li Ying, Shih Yann and Annu have abandoned me to go home while I sit here in helplessly in the school's library hahaz! I have V.E. later on at 7pm so...*sighs* bored!!

To carry on my previous post, I met up with Izyani on Saturday at City Hall interchange to go to Bugis to watch...Transformers!! One word: COOL!

We also found the gothic shop there and are pretty excited about the CosFest coming up. Thing is, we don't have enough cash to get a costume!!! T.T So much for *flashback*

Izyani: Hey, this year...let's strive to get a costume for CosFest okay?

Me: OKAY!

*end flashback* There's more that went on but I'm too tired to remember anything. But not to disappoint anyone, here's some jokes I got from my mum's blog to beat the Monday Blues! ^.^

*pokes fingers together nervously* I don't know if you find them funny but it tickled my funny bone ^.^

If you don't like it, then *blows a raspberry - that's when you pull one of the bottom eyelids and stick out your tongue at the person* NYA!! TOO BAD!!! hehe

Remember, these jokes are meant for humor...I do not mean to insult anyone...If you feel insulted, let me apologise beforehand for anything *bows*

Onto the jokes!

An American, a Japanese and an Indian were sitting naked in the sauna. Suddenly there was a beeping sound. The American pressed his forearm and the beeping stopped. The others looked at him questioningly.

"That's my pager," he said, "I have a microchip under the skin of my arm."

A few minutes later a phone rang. The Japanese lifted his palm to his ear. When he finished he explained, "That's my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand."

The Indian felt low-tech and inferior. He didn't know what to do to be as impressive as the American and the Japanese. He decided to take a break in the toilet. When he returned, he didn't realize that there was a piece of toilet paper that got stuck and was hanging from his ass.

The others raised their eyebrows and said, "Wow! What's that?" Instead, to avoid being embarrassed, inspiration struck his mind. The Indian explained, "I'm getting a FAX."

Hahahaz! What a clever guy!!! I applaud his wit!

ESCAPED PRISONER

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

MUWHAHAHAH!!! Poor husband...he is the one who ended up suffering! Hahaz

USE BIG PEOPLE TALK

A group of kindergartners were trying very hard to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk!"

You need to use 'Big People' words," she was always reminding them. She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit my Nana."

"No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use Big People' words!"She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo choo."

She said "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use "Big People' words!"

She then asked little Alec what he had done.

"I read a book," he replied.

"That's WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?"

I love this part! LOL!

Alec thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride, and said, "Winnie the SHIT."

ROTFLMAO!!! Smart kid...hahaz!

Okay, I hope I beat away any blues BUT if you didn't understand anything (for some UNKNOWN reason), please tell me so I may explain *grins*

Ja ne,

Leandra

New Look ^.^

2007-07-02T10:08:00.000+08:00

Hey!

In Computing Maths class, waiting for that stupid teacher to come. So I decided to blog ^.^! My god, the whole lecture theatre smells of...*makes a face* chilli...I don't really have a liking to any hot stuff (unless you count guys *winks* hahaz!)...weirdly enough, I seem to like laksa and curry alot...*nods head solemnly* I must be a sucker for punishment.

ANYWAY, i finally get to learn how to do the Passion dance! ^.^ Though...*pokes fingers nervously* I kinda forgot some of the steps...hehe...

Inner Self: *sweatdrops* Pathetic...

*bows head* I KNOW!!! But I've been straining really hard, trying to remember...I think the best solution is to ask the rest...Uh oh, that stupid teacher is here...I'll finish posting later...

Ja ne,
Leandra

BACK FROM FOREIGN BODIES CAMP!!!

2007-06-24T17:16:00.000+08:00

HEY!!!

I'm back from my Foreign Bodies dance camp! IT WAS ROCKIN'!!! I made so many new friends! I was in Group 3, KILLER BEEZ!!!

Shoutouts to my group memebers:

Christine (Leader)

Wei Keat (Leader)

Arjuna (Leader)

Fong (Leader)

Audrey

Bryan

Hanisah

Hazel

Karen

Kash

Kenny

Xuan Hong

Yi Zheng

Jeanie

Baoxin

Jorge

Nadra

Okay, I know there are more but I can't remember...So, if your name is not here, PLEASE TELL ME!!! I will put it in! >.<>

Either way, I had a blast with EVERYONE!!! We should bond more! We started out with getting our group name (Killer Beez) then a cheer:

Strong As We Are! *does macho pose*

Sexy As We Are! * does sexy moves*

Strong And Sexy As We Are,

We Sting Like A Bee!

*makes buzzing noise*

*pokes butt* OW!

HAHAHA! After that we played some ice-breaker games before going for our dance practice. During the two days of dance practice, we learnt new things like the basic hip-hop moves, popping, locking, reggae, etc. THEY ALL WERE SO COOL!!! Though half the time, I didn't do because of my sprained ankle but it was still so cool...

Inner Self: *sweat-drops*

Hehe...anyway, I took some pictures for you all to see!!!

This is when I came back from the camp; before I went to sleep... During the first night, the girls and I talked about lotsa stuff (ghost stories especially) and due to my over-imaginative mind, I couldn't sleep in fear of all the stupid ghosts coming after me... During the second night, everyone went to bed pretty late and even though I was very tired, I couldn't fall asleep...I just stoned for two hours lolz!

This is during the first night...The girls and I were fooling around hahahaz!! That black things at the corner looks really scary right? It was Siti with her back to the camera! LOLZ!

This is on the third day...Left to right: Me, Hazel and Kelly...

Inner Self: *sweat-drops* You're useless...

*scratches back of head* I'M SORRY!!! To whoever who saw this and know her name, PLEASE TELL ME!!! Thos was after our breakfast and before Hazel had to go off for a family gathering... To Hazel: I had a blast talking to ya and getting to know ya...Guess we didn't get scared during the nightwalke hahaz! Still, I had a fun time...Missing ya already! Take care!

Updated: I GOT HER NAME!!! YAY!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting Group 3's mascot - THE ROBOT KILLER BEE CHUN LI!!! Played by...our very own HANISAH!!! She's SO cute!! We had to dress up a mascot and since she's the smallest size out of all of us, she became the mascot! Actually, she was the 'Princess'...We were playing a game called 'Save The Princess'...from water bombs...lolz

A bee IS a bee...That's her stinger lolz! Thats Ira, looking sleepy and pointing to the stinger! Of course, we won the whole game because even though it wasn't the most fashionable mascot, it was the most heavily wrapped up one! LOLZ! I had to sit out this game because of my ankle once again...I was pretty far away and couldn't see where my group was...Then I realised that my group's guys didn't wear their shirts! LOLZ!

OH! Before we played the game, Farhan (the overall I/C) asked those who had injuried to sit out...I, being my stubborn self, didn't...Then they played a small 'game'...They told us to SQUEEZE together, close our eyes and hold up our hands...They will put an animal figurine on anyone of our hands and we will have to figure what it was and tell ALL our group members...So we were all ready with our eyes closed and hands up...

THEN THEY SPLASH US WITH WATER FROM BEHIND!!!

I tell you, that was the fastest my bandage shrank...LOLZ!!!

This is Nora and me!!! I LOVE NORA!!! She rocks man! Hey Nora, if you can't do any steps, don't fret...I can't too lolz! We'll get it! Don't worry!

This is on the first night...Nora, Amit and me...Actually *pokes fingers together nervously* Hanisah was behind me...I DIDN'T KNOW I SWEAR!!! *bows* I'M SORRY HANISAH!!!

First night...From left to right: Jorge, me, Thiri, Hanisah and Amit...

Last day: leftover girls in the dorm...Too many to list out but these gals rocks!!! Miss you all!

First day: here's the girls and I were fooling around lolz!! It's me, Nora, Siti, Mahira...LOVE YOU GUYS!!! See ya on Friday...

Lastly, GROUP 3 'KILLER BEEZ'!!!

Oh, one of the games which I will remember is the Apple-Eating game...Two people faced each other: one had to hold the apple with their mouth and their other eat away...From one point of view, it looks like they were kissing!!!

Speaking of kissing...LOLZ!! We played another game called 'Hygenic Kissing'. We had to pass a plastic sheet with our mouths...Fong purposely put two guys next to me!!! o////o Either way, I;m sad to say that my first "kisses" with two guys and two girls (I won't name names because I'm afraid they might have boy/girlfriends or might feel uncomfortable) had a plastic sheet inbetween...LOLZ! I had a blast still...we played till we had a tied with Group 1...We won AGAIN! n battled the Seniors...They won (DUH)! Lolz!

During the last part of the camp, we had to do our own choreography to a song...EVERY GROUP'S CHOREOGRAPHY IS SOOOO COOL!!!!

I remember the first group's cute moves of the guys' in front shaking their butts and them on the floor shaking their heads cutely!

The second group jumped around and riled up the crowd!

The third group (us) had the girls doing reggae and the guys popping (longer than I thought) but it was so cooL! Oh, Yi Zheng, don't feel bad for your long move - we loved it!! ^.^

The last group had the BEST pass on from one side to another and they put in the techniques we learnt!

All in all, I loved the camp!!! Though I'm very tired, I still would like to having more of FB! ^.^

I talk more and more during camp and for once, I felt so comfortable...I made so many new friends and felt more 'family' with FB ^.^

There's A First Time For Everything

2007-06-12T17:05:00.000+08:00

Hey guys (and gals)!

Long time no post! ^.^ Well, I've been pretty packed because I was in the StageArts camp!! ^.^ It was SUPER fun! All of us were grouped in different groups and my group's name was Witchazoids! O.o? Hahaz, the theme of the whole camp was Wiccan's Covenant so everything was based on that!

Even though we were all in different groups, that doesn't mean that we didn't mix around. I got to know more and more people and the gals are way fun! Here's two of them!

Meet Amirah and Theodora! Bunking next to me (I was all the way in one corner because I had a temperature of 37.4 degrees hahaz). On the first night, all I could say was that us gals played truth or dare! I can't indulge any more information because we all promised that what went on in there that night, STAYED there that night! ^.^

The second day was very tiring I had to admit. It started with P.T. (which I didn't do because I was sick), then some games at five different "stops". It was really fun! Especially the obstacle course -- though the apples we had to pick up with our mouths was really dirty and by the end, we were all covered in dirt and stuff.

After breakfast, the different groups were grouped again into three sections -- to go for Dance, Drama (TMT) and Make-Up. We got chosen to go to Drama first. We had three hours of that until lunch. After that was Dance. >.< I totally forgot the pain of all those stretches we had to do before dancing!

After dancing, the seniors played with us a game. It was supposed to help us to think quickly. They showed us first. The game was REALLY fun!

After dance, we went onto Make-Up. The overall "fun" part was that each group had to pick our two models and paint them to look like different kind of witches. Iqah and I volunteered! I took many pictures of the different groups' witches!

This was Brendon and Zul. Zul was supposed to be a frog O.o? Hahaz!

Here's Sarah! Her partner was M.I.A. that time I think...? Hahaz!

Iqah and Fadullah (is that how to spell his name? hahaz)! The beautiful witch and the demon king!

That's me!!! Comparing myself to the others, I had more...stuff...on me because my make-up artists thought that my face was too plain hahaz! Maybe it's because of my fair skin! Hahaz! While Iqah is the beautiful witch, I'm obviously the EVIL witch! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Do you not see the "blood" dripping from the side of my lips? MUWHAHAHA!!! Hahaz! (By the way, the symbol on my forehead took quite alot of time to remove it hahaz!)

And finally, the winners of the most scariest witches is THE DEMON KING AND HIS WIFE!!! Hahaz! Their victims were their make-up artists! Hahaz! We had a blast!

After that, we had dinner and after dinner was Seance Night! We went to the school's dome were everything was decorated to look like a witches' gathering! Candles, curtains and the lights were reddish too! We cheered! We played games! We took turns to come out and act a short skit!

During the Witchazoids' turn, oooh boy! Hahaz! We had Huda to go out in the centre of the stage as the Old Devil. She shrieked perfectly. One by one, the others (we were the witches) had to come out (from the top of the place), downt the stairs and onto the stage and attack her. I was first. And boy was it a grand entrance! I went down the stairs perfectly fine. When I climbed up the stage, my toes got caught onto one of the drainage hole thingy (O.o?) and I COMPLETELY TWISTED MY RIGHT ANKLE!!!

*silence*

*bursts out laughing* Hahaz!! I know you guys are laughing! It's fine, I look back and imagine myself as the audience and laughed! It was DAMN PAINFUL!!! But I was also concerned about the skit. When Jocelyn (the StageArts Camp Medic) came up to me and helped me, the words that came out of my mouth were: (after she asked me if I could stand) "I can't stand! It hurts! Tell the others to continue!" Hahaz!

Boy did my ankle swell! Towards 1am in the morning, Jocelyn who had painstakingly (together with a few others) helped me up to the forum at Block E (ok, she and Farhana actually carried me up >.< I FEEL SO BAD!), was very worried that it might be a fracture. She got an Alumni (who was a certified nurse) to check on it. She said it wasn't a fracture but it was best to send me home and the next morning, I had to go to the doctor to check it out.

My team members...and Shavien, helped me get my bags and the seniors called a cab and off home I went. I am eternally GRATEFUL for the help given to me during this time! I will pay you guys back - I promise! *eyes shine with determination*

Now, its better already. It isn't as bulbous as before but still rather swollen and painful. I've been using my brother's old crutches (shorten to my height, of course) to walk around or if I can't be bothered, jumping and hoping around to move about. Hahaz! Sometimes I forget and use my right leg to walk (since it IS my dominant leg). >.< PAIN!!! Hahaz!

My body has been sore (my shoulders to my wrists to be exact and my leg left too) since I've been using them to help me to walk about. Owwiee...>.<

Anyway, I think I left some things back at camp. Hope no one throws them away! And I didn't get my StageArts t-shirt!!! I WANT!!! Hahaz!

Oh, the doctor says no activity for two weeks and no strenuous exercise for another two more weeks (no difference because the most strenuous I've done is dancing!). I can't go for my Voice Ensemble camp and it starts today! I was SO looking forward!

Oh well, the doctor said that I might be able to go for the Foreign Bodies camp but no exercising though *sighs*

Okay then, that's about it! I'll update another time then!

Ja ne,
Leandra

My Heart Can't Start Beating!

2007-06-03T20:00:00.000+08:00

Hey guys!

Finally! A time to blog! As you all can see, I rarely have the time to blog. ANYWAY, interesting week happened, ESPECIALLY towards the end. First up, on Monday I had Voice Ensemble. It was okay -- we had two new memebers. WELCOME! Anyway, we were learning a song in Malay - i think. Our conductor, Mr Ong, had to bring out the different sections to work on them. I managed to take a picture of when he was working with the Tenors! Look!

He was using some method to make them sound...nicer...? I don't know, I was talking to Sheryl. All I remembered was that they look funny! Hahaz! Sorry if anyone of the tenors are looking at this! I couldn't help it! *bows*

Anyway, my brother, Jermaine (yes, that's a guy's name), got a new guitar!!! He actually got it last week but I haven't gotten the chance to upload a picture of it. He got it really cheap too! *pouts* lucky...Either way, isn't it beautiful? *swoons at the beautiful instrument*

Here's a picture of my brother playing! It's really blur because my hands were shaky *grins nervously, scratching back of head* Hehe...

I know, i know...he doesn't look all "rockstar" like...He was just fooling around and trying out the new guitar. Oh! And he got new shoes! I LIKE!!! It's SUPER cool! Look!

I totally want those shoes! Nya! More importantly, he also got a new mp3. The new Creative Zen Stone or something like that. He got the black one (DUH! What other color would we take?). He's one lucky ___(I'm not saying anything in fear of my own safety :X hahaz)! I have to save my own money to get one. Yup, he didn't pay a single cent for his new stuff! *whines* NOT FAIR!!!

Getting of that heart-paining topic, F.B. was interesting. On wednesday, I went to a self-practice with the girls. It was fun! I got to know them more and everything was cool! We started at 5 plus? till almost 10 i think. But towards the end, we slacked. What? We were tired! So we sat and talked (though half the time I didn't understand 'cause they were speaking in Malay so some had to translate for me -- thanks to those who helped!). We took some pictures because Ira needed some pictures for a project, was it? Anyway, I got one! Look!

It was (from top left to right, then bottom left to right) Nora, Me, Hanisah, Mahi, Ira, Siti and Syakira! I have absolutely no idea what the hell was I doing! Ira, I wanna retake another picture! Hahaz

Anyway, on Friday was like the most emotional F.B. practice! It started all right but halfway, the seniors got really REALLY strict and scary! They were scolding us like crazy!!! I just kept quiet because I didn't dare...hello? They're scary! Lesson here: don't mess with seniors! Juniors, yes. But seniors, no!

Anyway, the showcase came. Every week, we would be asked to showcase what we were taught and the seniors would pick the better ones. Twelve were picked this week. I wasn't, DUH! But Hanisah and Syakira was! Go them!!! ^.^

The seniors talked to the ones that weren't picked. They scolded us and told us that actually a second secret audition was being held during our practices and the twelve picked are the ones who actually got through to F.B. The rest are...I quote: "yeah, you know..." (For those who didn't get it, we were being kicked out)

I swear to you my heart stopped and turned solid -- like glass solid. Tears were at my eyes but I refused to let it get out. Hello? I want my dignity intact!!! Then the seniors tried to make things better by apologising and tell us not to be sad. When we were about to pack up and leave, they told us to sit closer to them. I was thinking: "HELL NO! They might scold us more!"

Reluctantly, we all moved closer to them. Nora, who was next to me, had an emotionless expression on. Wow, that girl could take it! That's what I thought when later on, she told me that she was just too tired to comprehend anything and if anything did go through, she was just like 'whatever' too tired to think of anything -.-" By this time already my tears were seriously threatening to come out and my heart had already stop beating. Anyway Fong stood up and was like "Don't be sad lah...because you guys are punk'd!"

WHAT THE HELL MAN!!!! I was like O.O!!! Before a large grin spread across my face, causing the tears to actually come out! Bloody hell! The seniors said it was tradition, being passed on from generations and that their seniors did the same thing to them!! I was like bloody hell! I wanted to pummel Fong to the ground (including the rest of the seniors actually)!

Then Fong, Eunice and the rest of the seniors apologised to us, saying that they're actually nice people! Hahaz...bloody hell, who knows what they'll pull during the F.B. camp! I forgive Fong...only a little...just because he remembered my name (not exactly my whole name but part of it). But when I went home, I still couldn't get my heart to start beating!!! >.< grrr!!! I hate punk'd...

Anyway, last week of school coming up! YAY!!! FINALLY!!! But then, I've got THREE camps to attend! First up, StageArts camp from 8-10 June. Then Voice Ensemble camp from 12-14 June. Then, finally the one I'm SUPER looking forward to (not that I'm not looking forward to the rest), Foreign Bodies camp from 21-23/24 June...or something like that. I gotta check out their website/notice board. Either way, it's gonna be a damn tiring holiday! But hopefully, fun too!

Alright then, gotta go! I gotta re-study for the Jave test coming up! >.<

Ja ne,
Leandra

!!!SUCCESS!!!

2007-05-28T14:54:00.000+08:00

I finally did it!!!! ^.^ I'm in Digital Media & Design class now and we're learning Flash 8 (no, not to learn how to flash! *glares at those assholes who are snickering*).

Since I already learnt how in Secondary 3, I just ignored the teacher (as usual *scratches back of the head nervously* hehe) and did my own. I didn't remember how to do everything so Aunty Shih Yann (who actually is listening) helped me alittle.

I made a little animation of how a stickman shot a LARGE bullet towards another stickman. The bullet went right to the second stickman and blood spilt! ^.^ Then the second stickman went down, down, down! Right into his own puddle of blood! ^.^

Now, I know that you guys are wondering WTF O.O? right? Sorry for those who think I'm weird. I'm...unique, bipolar, etc. Don't worry, I'm not violent...*a sadistic grin appears*...much! Nah, I won't hurt you - unless you seriously piss me off like a certain SOMEBODY (AKA Vanessa Elizabeth Edwards)!!!

ANYWAY, I'll post up more -- when I have the chance to. Not right now since I don't have much to report. Except for the fact that *wails* I forgot to bring my wire to charge my mp4!! T.T The battery life might not last till I go home! Maybe my seniors in V.E. might have...later I ask. ^.^ I do hope they have.

Oh well, I'm gonna go to Quizilla and try to find some Alice Nine/Dir En Grey/Miyavi/etc stories!

Ja ne,
Leandra

No Pain, No Gain

2007-05-27T20:38:00.000+08:00

Hey guys,

I know I'm a little late in posting on Friday's and Saturday's happenings but it's not everyday that I get on the computer y'know. Besides, this computer is not mine too! *pouts*

Anyway, on Friday...I decided to go for Foreign Bodies! ^.^ I feel REALLY bad for not going for the StageArts Nite but apparently, I found out that F.B. has a performance coming up! *le gasp!* I'm not sure I can handle it but *grins and poses* it won't hurt to give it my best shot!

This week, we learnt only 4-8's of the whole choreography only but it was really hard! I'm STILL aching like hell from that night's practice. When I went home, my back really hurt and ached. But on Saturday, the pain increased tenfold!!! Oh, and the pain in my legs and arms came too. But it wasn't as painful as last week. I guess as each week goes by, the pain lessens. But this coming week I won't be able to go for the practice! It's because I have the StageArts camp! Bloody hell, how am I to know the steps? Maybe if I went for the Thursday one...but it's a long day! I find at 6pm and the practice starts at 6pm!! I won't survive! Oh wait, it's a school holiday that day... *sighs* I guess I have to think of a solution again.

*looks at above* Wow, that's alot of 'but's. Either way, I dread going to school tomorrow. Why, you ask? It's because I can't even bend down due to the pain I'm feeling in my body! Also, so early in the morning and I already have to look that that B!+CH Vanessa (from my class, not Siglap Seconday School) face again! *sighs* Not to mention, some of my friends (not to mention any names here) are VERY EMO in the morning -- which makes me angry-pissed off-emo too! Theirs is sad-gloomy-end of the world-emo. Mine is angry-pissed off-emo. There's a difference.

A word of advice: (I really hate to pin-point anyone but this is to those who are emo around your friends alot -- be it in NYP, work, or anywhere else) DON'T LET YOUR EMO-NESS AFFECT YOUR FRIENDS! I learnt it the hard way. Whenever I was emo, my friends would get really pissed off at me. Thus, bringing down the WHOLE mood until we part towards home. And since now we're all in Poly life already, we practically see our friends almost three-quarters of the day. Would you like to be pissed and emo with all your friends the WHOLE FRICKIN' DAY? No right? (*in a serious tone* If you said yes, please come and find me: you might need serious counselling ^.^) So don't bring down not only your friends but your mood the whole day. Lighten up! Have a cookie! *hands everyone a cookie* ^.^

Anyway, on Saturday, I met up with Shavien and Izyani! Shavien needed help in her project and she was supposed to film me. I had to gorged myself on food to advertise some cough drops. I think I might need them more now since my throat has been hurting like hell since this afternoon. Hahaz. Either way, Izyani was having the time of her life watching me embarrass myself by gorging KFC in public! Oh the shame!! *takes paper bag and covers head with it*

After that, Shavien went home and Izyani and I went to Century Square to get some stuff. Izyani bought herself a new concealer (which I will when I get more moo-lah <- my TM) and I bought a new fruity lip gloss ^.^ !! They're both from Maybelline! Since it's branded, it was kinda expensive but it was kinda like a once in a while treat for both of us since we never buy any make-up for ourselves! ^.^

After THAT, we went to the second floor girls' bathroom (because it was the most grand ^.^) to try out the new make-up! It worked perfectly! And my lip gloss was delicious! ^.^ (to those idiots who are reading this: -.- no, I did not eat my lip gloss. Since it was applied on my lips, I was able to taste it -.- dunce)

Once that was done, we headed to City Hall. We were SUPPOSED to go to Suntec City to find a shop which we loved but because it would take alot of walking and I'm in ALOT of pain, we decided to go to Marina Square instead (was it Marina Square? O.o *shrugs* oh well!). We walked around, checked out the wonderful shops and went back to White Sands for dinner -- uh, desserts!

We made up our minds to go to Swensens at White Sands. But since we didn't have that much money, we decided to just treat ourselves ice-cream! ^.^ We really hadn't got the time to eat ice-cream so just this once! We bought the regular earthquake! ^.^ Oh, and some fries too! We had a blast -- gloating to the kids next door who were drooling at our ice-cream. *gives an innocent look* WHAT? They DID gloat about their stupid fish-and-chips! *pouts* Oh, and we took pictures too! (Yeah, we didn't have anything better to do hahaz)

These fries are the best!!!

Front view of this magnificiently expensive but oh-so-delicious ice-cream sundae!!!

Top view of the same ice-cream sundae BEFORE it was eaten!

*in LOTR's Golemn's creepy voice* My precioussss....

Aww...No more ice-cream!!! T.T $16.90 went to mine and Izyani's stomach!

During the whole time, I had the most fun I had during the weeks I had in school (not that being with my friends in school were boring) Izyani's my best friend -- she's been there for me through thick and thin and will be for many years to come! (I'm sure of it as I will be for her) Either way, I was reminded of my prom night where she, after school, came with me and my family to the salon and my house to help me get ready. She still has the picture of my hairdo (WTF? O.o? hahaz) and of us in the lift before I went to my ride. Here are the pictures:

It looks a little messy but I guess that was how it was supposed to be..O.o? Either way, yes I was on the phone -.-

There! Both of us in the lift before I went on my merry way! I was so happy she was there for me ^.^

All right then! That was all I guess! I have more prom night pictures. I will post them up -- someday! Or if someone asks me too! hahaz!

Ja ne,
Leandra
Kuro Tenshi
Kaira Lilith Darkmoon
Lilyanne Montgomery

P.S. Please do not steal these characters. I made them from scratch so *eyes glint, along with the knife in my hand* steal them and die!

...I'm Outta Cash...T.T

2007-05-25T14:17:00.000+08:00

Hey,

Past few days were...normal...Well, as normal as you can get from be irritated by a B!+CH *coughVanessaElizabethEdwardscough* Right now, Li Ying and I are just ignoring her. It's no big deal. She's just a blurry CREATURE there. ^.^

You know what I don't like? Making decisions >.< I know you guys must be thinking "WTH?" but yeah, it's true! I'm afraid to make the wrong decision, thus affecting not only myself but others too! And today, I have to make one. To go for Foreign Bodies or for StageArts Nite. Not to mention, I have to go for the Campus Crusade for Christ because I promised someone. AND there's some sort of a show I have to go for too!

*clutches head* UWAHH! HEADACHE! The more important one is whether to go for F.B. or StageArts. I couldn't decide so I wore the F.B. clothes BUT brought the StageArts Nite clothing. Apparently, we're supposed to cosplay as our idol or something we like. O.o I have ABSOLUTELY no idea what to wear! So I just use my prom night dress and say...I'm some diva...? O.o???

Whatever the case is, I ACTUALLY decided to go for F.B. but now I just heard that StageArts Nite is COMPULSORY! Aw man...Later, I shall go and check the board. *sighsighsighs*

*looks at post title* Oh yeah! I have no more moo-lah(MY TM!!!) because over the past two-three weeks, I bought clothing! Let's see *flashback*:

Me: *stares at the armwarmers and stockings* How much?
Shopkeeper: $10 each.
Me: *stares again, then at wallet* All right, I guess. *hands shopkeeper money while sobbing hysterically internally*
Shopkeeper: *accepts money with a LARGE grin on her face*

Me: *searching for cargo pants* AH! *sees one and holds it up*
Izyani: Try it on lah.
Me: *skips happily to try it on*
...Ten minutes later...
Me: *comes out sobbing and look down at the cargo pants* I'm so short!!!!
Izyani: *burst out laughing*
Shopkeeper: *stifling her giggles* We can alter for you for free.
Me: *perks up* Honto? Okay! *remembers* Oh um...how much is the pants?
Shopkeeper: *smiling* $36
Me: *has momentarily heart attack*
Izyani: You said you need it...
Me: *sobs internally* Okay *hands NETS over*
Shopkeeper: *receives it and swipe it* You can collect your pants tomorrow after 5pm. Please bring this receipt.

*end flashback*

Yup. My heart cried for hours after that. But a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. Hahaz Anyway, this shopping 'spree' means no food for quite some time. Or rather, little food. Oh, and Izyani finally bought a hoodie! I LIKE IT!!! Maybe I save again and go buy it. It was $22!!! The original price was $33. Oh well...This saturday, I'm going out with her again because she wants to buy the headphones.

She has a purpose. She has to go to Pontian in June for some wedding thing and because SOME things irk her, she wants to block them out with her music. So she'll wear those headphones and blast her music while donned in her new hoodie WITH the hood up. EMO ALERT! Hahaz!

Alright then, I'm going back to not listening to the teacher in Database Fundamentals and finding more J-Rock pictures! Yay Alice Nine! Yay Nightmare! Yay Gackt! ^.^

Ja ne,
Leandra
Kuro Tenshi

!Quick Hi!

2007-05-21T15:35:00.000+08:00

Hey!

I finally got the chance to get on the computer and make some changes to my blog!! YAY! I did it in DMD class *pokes fingers* I'm sorry! But no choice lah! Either way, I've come to tell about both Friday and Saturday's events!

On friday, there was F.B. (Foreign Bodies is a cool hip hop dance CCA which I've managed to get into!) practice! The first! We played a game where they gave us choreography for 4 letters (A, B, C, D). Then we are to put them together and perform for everyone in our groups! Our group got ABACDBAA!! So tough! But we were synchronized...in making mistakes! Hahaz!

Oh well, what to do? I had fun! Despite the pains and aches I experience the next morning...hehe..

Oh saturday, I met up with Bryan, HuiHui and Fendi for HuiHui's 22nd birthday. It was cool. But I ended up going to the Paul Twohill concert which I won.

Okay, I would say more...in the next post because I've got three friends waiting impatiently for me hahaaz! Sorry!

Ja ne,
Leandra

Good Morning, Let The Stress Begin ^.^

2007-05-14T06:07:00.000+08:00

Hey,

It's...*looks at clock* 6.08am that I'm starting this post. Way too early right? Well, I've got another oh-say-about 20 minutes before I have to leave for school (I know what you're thinking: 'WTF? That's too early and classes start at 8am!') so I decided to put up a post. Yes, it IS kinda early. To those who live near NYP, lucky asses...no need to wake up so bloody early. I, UNFORTUNATELY, live an hour and a half away from NYP *pouts*.

With Drowning Pool's 'Let The Bodies Hit The Floor' coming out from my computer's speakers, I shall begin! *grins*

Yesterday, as we all know, was Mother's Day. You know how we all usually take pride in the fact that some of us thought of, bought and wrapped our mothers' presents early? To beat the late rush? Yeah, I did one-third of those things. *song changes to 3 Doors Down's Kyrptonite (<-- yeah, I have nothing better to do than to write down what I'm listening to hehe)*

I had thought of getting my mum a tattoo because she wanted to! ^.^ I can just see the 'WTF?' and 'WTH?' going through your minds now. Hahaz! Yes, my own MOTHER wanted to get a tattoo of mine and my brother's name at the small of her back. After reading the article in Seventeen (I think) about the girl who got a tattoo and now it left her badly scarred, I decided not to because the tattoo parlour I wanted to bring my mum too -- I wasn't sure if it was a professional one (no offense to the tattoo artist).

SO, on Saturday night, Izyani and I decided to meet at 4.30pm (which ended with us meeting at 5-5.30pm) to go shop for our mums' presents. We met up, went to eat (because both of us missed lunch) and were raring to go at 6.30pm. Yeah, it took us close to 1-1 and a half hour to eat. We chatted okay? ALOT of things have been happening to both of us.

We traveled around Tampines Mall and Century Square (two times for Century Square), getting side-tracked at Comics Connections (DUH!), Poh Kim, etc. *grins sheepishly* hehe!

FINALLY stopping at Cards 'n' Such, Izyani chose a nice stuffed bear for her mother (which I thought was rather cute. *looks up at previous post* I know, such weird words coming from such a violent girl -- WHAT? I AM a girl y'know). It took me a longer time to get something -- because I had to get for my mother, grandmother AND aunt -- the three women who act like a mother to me (with one ACTUALLY BEING my mother).

After much deliberation (okay, it was more like:

Izyani: "Hurry up, Leandra! Pick something!"
Me: "Wait!" *eyes surveying and getting side-tracked with things that I like*

hehe), I picked a very nice and LARGE mug with the words 'A Garden of LOVE Grows in a Grandmother's Heart.' written on it for my grandmother (DUH!), a handphone strap with 'LINDA' printed on it and a 'LINDA' scented candle for my aunt and a porcelain figurine of a red rose in a vase, with the flower itself in red and leaves in green, for my mother.

When paying for it (reluctantly T.T), the cash register read: '$19.90'. My heart soared at the cheap price but sank when the rational side of me argued that it couldn't be. The cashier re-scanned the things and it came up higher (I won't tell 'cause my family members might see). I paid and Izyani and I went to the florist where we each got a pink, red and white rose. She gave all three roses to her mother while I separated them -- pink for my grandmother, red for my mother and white for my aunt.

*looks at time and eyes widened* OOPS! I gotta go! I'll see ya soon!

Ja ne,
Leandra

...Tiredness Consumed My Mind, Pounding Deep Into My Mind...

2007-05-11T15:22:00.000+08:00

Tiredness consumes my mind, body and soul

Rendering me unconscious and cold

Oncoming headaches

Harsh pounding it makes

I never wanna leave this blissful unconsciousness

I admit that I confess

This week's events fill my head with demented thoughts

The bitch within awakens

The bitterness burns

Guilt that fills disappears

Eyes never see,

Ears never hear

"It's not my fault

Only hers"

Anger locked in a vault

Unleashed

Sorry for that (VERY BAD) emo poem, folks! I'm super pissed at a certain classmate of mine. She's TOTALLY COPYING ME!!!! Taking over my life and seriously stealing the friends I've got. Good thing the friends which are in the same class don't like her too. She's copying them too!

WTF man...But she's totally taking away my friends! And she had the BLOODY guts to rolls her BLOODY eyes at me when I'm talking to my friends! Well, her eyes aren't exactly bloody yet but they will be if she crosses the line again! I seriously can not stand her anymore!

No more Miss "Nice-Flower-Power-Girl"! I'm SO turning bitch-mode on her! She unleashes the bitch within!

Oh, and I've been wanting to do this for days. My brother had thought of some very DARK and gruesome poems and I want to post it up!

To those who don't like this, please ignore the last part! To those who like it, comment and tell me please! Thanks!

Ja ne,

Leandra

SEE YOU IN HELL

You are gasping for air

As I tighten a belt around your neck

You struggle to get free

Whilst I strap your hands to the chairs

And legs to the floor with a burning wire

I pour kerosine all over your body

As I light that match

All you said was,

"I'll see you in Hell."

Glad to be there,

Motherfucker

SUFFER FOR ME

May your flesh burn

And you feel every bone-crushing second

As I slice off your skin,

Layer by layer

With a burnt rusty knife

Tearing your arms off by force

Whilst I take a knife

To screw out your eyeballs and cut the cord

Forcing down your throat

A spear as sharp as a diamond cutter

Breaking open your ribs and tearing out your heart

Still you scream in pain hoping someone will save you

We are in a marsh*

No one can hear your cries for help

Go ahead

Continue screaming

Whilst I feed your body parts to the alligators

*a very thick forest
Disclaimer: Jermaine (Yes, that's my BROTHER)

...Astonishment Pounds My Head...

2007-05-09T21:09:00.000+08:00

Heya to whoever wants to bother to read this,

I'm dead tired (yeah, I know...that's what I say EVERY SINGLE TIME I put up a new post). And I've just realised that I now have FOUR CCAs and I have to drop one. Yes folks, I SOMEHOW managed to get into Foreign Bodies. I didn't get into the one for jazz or social but I got into the hip hop one... Can you say...WTF O.o? I'm still in shock and I feel HORRIBLE because I think people like Suet (08) and Li Ying should be in more than me. They deserve it.

I mean, HELLO? These people have the body for dancing. Annu too but she didn't go for the audition because that woman last minute chicken out. -.-" But if she did, she would get in.

Congradualations to Nora, Hanisah and Bryan/Bu Rai You -- Hahaz, inside joke -- (From SHS, Nursing) for getting into Foreign Bodies! You guys were great!

Li Ying, don't be demoralized! Don't worry, we won't give up! We will try as much as possible for you to get in! Better you get in than THAT WOMAN. And please don't give up! I know you can do it! Like Annu said, "If Leandra can do it, you SURE can do it!" (Remember that)

Back to the situation at hand, I HAVE FOUR FRICKIN CCAS! *says to mind* I know what you assholes are thinking: "This is what you get for being so enthusiastic! Who the hell asked you to join/audition for SIX FRICKIN' CCAS?!" Shut up! I'm trying to solve this!

I can't quit Foreign Bodies because...are you frickin' insane?! Though it's pure luck that I got in, I could work hard! And this is my only form of exercise to lose weight! *inner self sweatdrops* Heheh...

I can't quit Drama because I love acting. I also told the seniors that though I joined other CCAs, this would be priority or something along the lines of that. It's my passion and the only way to express myself (and gain self-confidence).

I can't quit Voice Ensemble because I like singing. And there's a performance coming up and I can't just go M.I.A. That would be rude! Not to mention, the Alto section (that's my section) is so small and they need all the voices they can get.

I can't quit Japanese Club because...I like it! *inner self sweatdrops once again* Heheh...I like anime and cosplaying and all that. Not to mention, SOME of the people there are nice and friendly! (I haven't gotten to know ALL yet...)

*tugs on hair* ARGH! What am I to do??? Any help from anyone? Ah...I'm not even sure of the practice days. I mean, Voice is on Monday (and Thursday for now). Jap Club is on Wednesday. Drama is on Saturday (and going to be on Wednesday). F.B. is on Friday (and I heard Wednesday). If that's the case, the only ones that don't have much problem is Voice and Jap Club. Jap Club will be given priority because it happens on only ONE day. Drama...maybe I go on Saturday only...F.B. maybe on Friday only...

Bloody hell, I am SO going to die by next semester. *looks up* God, please give me strength and wisdom to know what to do!!! >.<

Ja ne,
Leandra

...Lost In A Small World...

2007-05-05T23:33:00.000+08:00

First off, I know what you're thinking: "Oh my god, not another emo." Sorry to say *grins* but I merely have taken a liking to poetic titles.

What I'm talking about is the day I had today. Went to school because of Drama practice. It was fun! The games were different but cool and we learnt about Voice Projection; the importance of it during a performance and whatnot. Either way, I had a whole day of fun and I met new people! Shoutouts to Shavien and Siewlin especially!

After that (we ended at about 2pm), I met up with Izyani and Hanisah. We went to the gothic shop and I finally got my top/shirt/sweater!!! YES! FINALLY! T.T Though it cost me $35...*sobs* To those fuckers who said $35 is nothing, screw you!!! I'm so low on cash! If you think it is nothing, then why don't YOU pay for MY stuff? Huh?! (Bitter? Yes. Hehe)

The top was very fitting on me so I'm SO gonna strive to lost some pounds (sad, yes I know) so it won't feel uncomfortable. But it's SOOOO kakoi! It had skulls and crosses, zips and chain! I have to find a NICE bottom to match that but wait -- get some cash first!

But next week, I wanna go back to that shop to get some arm warmers or knee-highs ^_^ Thank godness I've already made friends with the owners or else they'll be wondering "What the hell is this girl doing? Coming back every week to buy something small? Why don't she make things easier and buy everything at one shot?" I would but T.T no cash! Hey Fazilla! You pay for me can? Hahaz! I will pay back lah but VERY slowly hahahaz!

Oh yah, I'm getting off track. The reason for the title: "Lost In A Small World" is because after Hanisah went home (so sorry you had to leave earlier), Izyani and I decided to go to...where was it again?...*shrugs* oh well...to get takoyaki (which Izyani has taken a liking to). Then we went to Heartland Mall to check out the scene. Why? Because me being my pathetic self, haven't been there before! Hahaz! We trailed out and found ourselves.........................
.............................
.............................
.............................
...LOST! (-.-" Whatcha expect?)
We took a random bus (119), hoping to find ourselves at somewhere we knew. Then, on the bus we saw 53 past us by. We stopped short in our conversation, stared at each other and said, "53! Then 81 must be around here! Wanna get off at the next stop and walked towards that 53 and 81 bust stop?" And so we pressed the button thingy to tell the driver that we wanted to get off at the next stop.

Seeing the next stop up ahead, we got off our asses and stood at the exit....That is, we THOUGHT it was the next stop. The damn bus just went by!!! Both of us were like O.O" Oh...kay...? We waited for the next stop, expecting it to be nearby. But NOOOOOO! It HAD to be so damn far away.

Izyani was asking, "You sure you wanna walk back to that bus stop?" I just shrugged and mumbled a reply. Hey, I was DAMN tired okay? So don't bother me! *shooes away annoying voices around that were telling me that I was being rude* But when we FINALLY got off, we found out that 81 comes to that VERY bus stop that we were standing under!!! YAY! We don't have to walk! So we waited and the bus came! Board the bus we did!

Upon seeing familiar territory, both Izyani and I relaxed drastically. Oh, and I found out that the places we went past, I do that every single day on the bus 72 to school! Hehe...sad, I know. We got off at West Plaza, which was opposite Izyani's home. We went to NTUC and I got cup noodle (*holds up now empty cup noodle and points* That was my dinner! ^_^). Both of us shared the price for the ice-cream tubs (because it was it was 2 for $5.65!). After that, I let Izyani go home 'cause she had a very painful oncoming stomach-ache. Usually, she would wait with me until my bus came.

Then, my bus came, I went home, I ate my pathetic dinner, I watched some T.V, decided to go to sleep but saw that the computer was free, decided to put up a post before I, being my forgetful self, forgot today's events, instead and will later go to sleep. Why so earlier? *looks at time -- 11.58pm* Because I have been waking up 3 hours before school starts (seeing as I live so damn far away) everyday, sleeping VERY late at night and I STILL have to wake up early tomorrow because I have church.

So if I miss anything out that I had promised to say -- *bows* gomen nasai! OH FINE! *glares at annoying voice* Gomen nasai to Izyani-sama for mumbling and being out-of-character today. No food + No sleep = OOC Leandra! Gomen nasai! *bows*

Alritey then! My eyes are only about to be open for a few more minutes so good night!

Ja ne,
Leandra

To Izyani: The background layout is dedicated to you! Sorry I couldn't find the shounen-ai layout! When I learn how to do it, I'll make one for ya, okay?

To Nora: Once again, take care and be well! Hope to see you soon on Monday!

...And So The Conflict Begins...A New Chapter In My Life...

2007-05-04T14:38:00.000+08:00

Hey guys (to whoever is actually reading this blog),

Today is a weird day...We're supposed to come to school at 9am for Communication Skills Make-up Lesson but that damn teacher didn't give us any information at al!! WTF? So the whole class planned not to go but SOMEONE decided to be very EXTRA and go for the lesson. Guess what? NO ONE WAS THERE!! NOT EVEN THE TEACHER! HAH! In your face, bitch! Yes, I'm in a damn pissed off mood because of a certain somebody (I think Shih Yann, Annu, Faz and Li Ying will know who).

To the people who are pissed off at me because of the mass MSN conversation, I would say I'm sorry but I only regret a little. Maybe I was a little too extreme but seriously, I know like...a handful of you people and you drag me in this mass thingy! If you guys wanna talk, talk to me in class or something! LY was damn pissed 'cause you guys just won't give her a break! ...And the damn handphone sound was pissing me off -.-" I know, I get irritated easily...sorry...Was pissed off earlier and I told you guys to "shut the fuck up" but you guys wouldn't. Lord knows how many people told you guys to stop it but you bloody well wouldn't!

To those who didn't have the -excuse my language once more- balls to stop or tell the culprit to stop, get some. I mean no offence, I don't entirely hate you guys. I hate SOMEONE else. Wanna know? Ask me and I might tell. ^_^

Oh, and Nora...so sorry to hear that you're unwell. Please take care of yourself. Rest lots and don't get too enthu during this period - unless it's a damn good reason hahaz! I will put up another post (that isn't too angry) and dedicate it to you!

For Izyani, the whole Jigoku Shoujo layout is dedicated to you!

Take care people! I'll check with ya another time!

Ja ne,
Leandra

!!!...I'm Baaccckkk...!!!

2007-05-01T18:14:00.000+08:00

Yo!

Yes, I'm still alive (surprisingly, seeing as I'm dead tired from everything's that has been happening around me) ^_^ Anyway, I got into Voice Ensemble (which really shocked me 'cause I had -- and still have -- a bad cough, sore throat and all that sickness when I went for the audition)...I'm in Alto 1 though some people are telling me I should be in Soprano instead o.O?

I went for the first practice yesterday and it was really fun (if you don't count the fact that I didn't eat dinner hahaz). We're having a performance in two weeks time...? We have to sing THREE songs, one of which is in Tagalog (a Phillipino language). The seniors have to sing FIVE...wow, we're really short on time which is why they are holding another practice on Thursday. *sighs* im gonna be dead by the end of this week hahaz

I managed to get into Drama too! But then again, I had a little experience and the monologe (SP?) i got was easy too! It was an "angry-at-the-world" emo so i could do it hehez...and the situation that they gave me (i'm supposed to re-act to it) was also "angry-at-the-world" emo...i loved it! It kinda felt like me sometimes...Yes, *nods head solemnly* I love emos...they're HOT! Ask Li Ying, she'll agree! hahaz! For Li Ying and all emo-boys-lover, the above pics are for you guys/girls/inbetweens!! And to the person who actually are the boys in these pictures, please send me a message so I can give you a proper apology for posting your pictures up! hehe *grins sheepishly*

Oh speaking of which, the great Izyani-sama (*grins smugly* yes, i know her! hahaz) and I found a gothic punk/lolita shop which sells way cool clothing (in our size!! -- we're not THAT large but a little more well-developed than other *coughpunycough* girls)...however, the clothing IS expensive (since this is from Japan) but some clothing were on sale...we each reserved one since both of us didn't have enough money at that time -- we're gonna get it on Sunday! *eyes sparkles* I promise you!

When we get those tops, I'll take pic and post it up to show you guys (no difference 'cause I'm gonna wear it to school! hahahaz!)!

To Izyani, if you're for some reason reading this, I'm sorry I didn't write anything more about our outings because well...I forgot. I know you're sweatdropping now...*bows head* GOMEN NASAI! I'm getting older and older...so forgive! When I remember, I'll do something about it.

Alrightey then, I'll put more stuff up another time. Check with ya later!

Ja ne,
Leandra

!WACKY!

2007-04-27T23:16:00.000+08:00

Before anything, I would like to ask if you guys could tell me how to let the music play on its own? I don't know how to do that! hahaz! Help? Please? Thanks!

What a wacky week! Especially today and yesterday!

Okay, get this...I can't believe I actually WILLINGLY went for the Foreign Bodies audition. I mean, hello? Since when can I dance? I know, i know...you're gonna say "If you have legs and can walk, you can dance." Yeah right! My hand, eye and foot co-ordination is like...wtf?

Hahaz...anyway, when I went into the room, I felt so ugly! SO SO SO many people were there and those girls who were there were like skinny and pretty! The clothing they wore was suited for Foreign Bodies (to those who forgot, it's kinda like hip-hop)! What I wore was suited for exercise! hahaz...it was a last minute decision to go for the audition on Wednesday. Was supposed to go on Thursday but since I had time, I decided to go on Wednesday. And on that very same day, my friends and I planned to go to the gym (OMG, I'm willingly doing a lot of things I say I won't be doing).

Anyway, the gym was closed for some weird unknown reason. It's a sign, I tell ya. hahaz! Anyway, after practicing for two hours the choreography they taught us for the audition, they decided to call up a group of five to dance three times: one with a senior, one alone and the last one they switched places (the front to the back and the back to the front). I was so damn nervous i puked! >.< Ew i know! But i did it in the bathroom so it was all right.

When it was my turn, I screwed it up!!! I'm SO unhappy with the failure! It was because I was so damn nervous! Looking at the seniors make me nervous. So during the third chance, I looked up and did much better! ^.^

Yesterday when I got home, I decided to go online for the first time in Lord knows how many months...I usually hate going online because people bug me when I'm reading stories or doing my own stories (to those who actually interested in reading my stories, tell me! I'll send ya!). But Li Ying (my lovely friend) linked me to a conversation with Nora (who I think is just as cool as Li Ying!) and then to Eggy (who actually is Luntart/Egg Tart).

It was one of the best conversation I had! These people are crazy!

Anyway, the next day or later that day or whatever, I was still kinda high and was really happy the whole day (if ya ignore the people who irritated me to no end -- Li Ying, I think you know who right? hahaz!). Towards the end of the day, Li Ying and I hanged with Nora and some of the 08 people. They are damn cool! ^.^

Looking forward to hang with everyone more!

Ja ne,
Leandra

Tired As Hell

2007-04-21T18:03:00.000+08:00

Listening To: Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus

What an interesting week! NYP kinda rocks! (If you ignore the LARGE campus, which equals to long distances between classes, resulting in me getting lost and getting tired legs) Anyway, there was some sort of a CCA Day event on Wednesday which I thought was REALLY cool.

Brilliant me decided to join for whatever catches my eye. This includes, the Japanese Club (the anime and the cosplay was AWESOME!), the Ballroom Dance Club (you get to do social dances like salsa, tango, waltz, etc), StageArts (Dance, Drama, Makeup & Backstage sections -- I'm taking the Dance and Drama only) and Foreign Bodies (they do hip-hop, b-boy and all those kinda dance). I filled out a survey for the Campus Crusade for Christ and I guess they put me in.

On Thursday, there was an event called the Jam & Hop. It was awesome! It was kinda a clubbing scene. I decided to go with a couple of my classmates. All of us started dancing -- actually, the girls danced first and we dragged the boys in (only three came -- Eugene, Eric and C.K.). Eric and C.K. was kinda into it but not Eugene. *mimicks Eugene* "I don't know the songs so I can't dance to it!" *rolls eyes* But when "Sexyback" by Justin Timberlake came on, he was into it! :)

People formed some sort of a circle where any takers would come in the middle of the circle and danced. We pushed Hanisah into it. She did some awesome moves! (DUH, this is coming from the very same girl in the winning dance group featured in a magazine) We pushed Eugene in too (don't we love to sabotage him? hehe) but damn coward was so stubborn and he tried to grab me and the others in! In the end, he ran away. Hahaz! He then pushed Cui Hui (our Assistant Class Rep.) into the circle and SHE pulled ME in! With the others behind pushing me! It was SO embarrassing! The final person we pushed in was Eric. And boy, were we ever surprised! Eric is like the quiet guy in class. He started breakdancing! It was so COOL! Overall, we had a blast!

Anyway, for the Ballroom Dance, StageArts and Foreign Bodies, you gotta audition (DUH!). So today, I was SUPPOSED to go for two auditions -- the Ballroom Dance and the drama section in StageArts. Apparently, I only went in for the Ballroom Dance because it dragged and overlapped StageArts. So they told me I could go for the Wednesday audition instead.

For the Ballroom Dance audition, the seniors taught us how to dance the salsa. We were supposed to wear a plain shirt, a knee-length skirt and high heels. I was the only "larger-then-average" girl there! It was SO embarrassing! I felt so...I don't know...ugly? there. Anyway, they taught us some steps and they partnered us up with the seniors. Can you believe that out of about 60 people who auditioned, there were only TWO guys! That was kinda...sad.

But anyway, when they partnered us up with the seniors, I felt very VERY nervous. Know why? The seniors are EXPERTS (well, to me) and the seniors were also very pretty and handsome! *blush* I kept on looking at my feet for two reasons: 1) if I look at my partner, I would become even MORE nervous! and 2) I was so afraid that I would step on his feet. ^_^" hehe.

But I got the hang of it! I really hope I did well! I really REALLY wanna get in (this kinda explains the 'Take the Lead' background)! Everything was so awesome (if I don't count the fact that my feet STILL hurts like hell -- but you gotta get use to dancing in high heels)! Maybe I'll practice at home. ^_^ *sighs* pity...I have no partner (I don't think my brother would wanna help -- *scoffs* AS IF!)...Oh well!

Wanna know something? *leans in* My heart is still beating like crazy from the close contact dance! *blush* but it's all cool...I'm just overwhelmed because I don't usually do close contact with guys (and family members DON'T count) Hahaz!

Oh well, gotta scoot!
Ja ne!
Leandra

Venting

2006-11-24T12:10:00.000+08:00

Ok, I know that I have not done anything to make my blog nice. I was busy and I actually have absolutely no idea how to put everything in so...later I'll do something about it.

All rightey then! Let's get it started. The venting I mean.

My life sucks...Okay, maybe only in certain areas but whatever.

To all the 'ugly' girls out there (i'm not saying that you're ugly but if you think you are, welcome to the Low Self-Esteem Club), i think we've been through this one too many times. Been through what you ask me? Been through rejection time and time and time again. Why? Because we're not pretty enough.

There are so many bullshit out there by guys who keep on saying "I want to look for a girl who likes me for me, doesn't matter how she looks like". Well, that's BULLSHIT! When you guys look at us, you immediately go into hypocrite mode: "Ew! She's ugly! I'm not even going to give her a chance to speak to me, let alone date me!" And all this without knowing how her personality is like.

Ironic no? That I have no love life experiences yet my friends all come to me for love advices. Somehow, they work. Maybe it's because I'm a romance writer. Whatever. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I've had SO many friends who come crying to me because the guy that they like likes some other prettier, sexier girl! PIGS!

Why am I complaining? It's because I've HAD ENOUGH! I admit, partially it's because I've been rejected too. But yeah, it's mostly because of that. Isn't that what blogs are about? To vent about your life? Well, that's what I'm doing.

Okay, I like this guy. He's not all that hot but cute and he's also romantic, sweet and really smart. Apparently, he knows that I like him but thinks that I don't like him anymore. Then he says he likes someone else. That hurt. So I got all moody (which to all girls, DON'T act like that. You have NO RIGHT to act like that. He is NOT your boyfriend) and he got pissed 'cause no one would tell him what was wrong. Then my friend told him and he was like "Shit, I didn't know! I thought she didn't like me anymore."

So, now both him and I are like trying to push away all the awkwardness. But you see, it's so hard! To a certain extent. I mean, it still hurts. I don't get it. I've been rejected one too many times so I SHOULD be numb by now! But WHY? Why does it still hurt?

And y'know the FRIEND who told him? She's like making plans with him to go out together. They say that it's just friends only. But why does my heart say something else?

Today, they're supposed to go out and they DID ask me along. Maybe because I was just there and they don't want me to feel left out. Anyway, I called her today to double-check and she said that she has no idea about anything because she has to clean up her room and stuff. She asked, "You wanna come?" I just replied with "If you and him wanna hang out together alone, then i won't go." She apologised profusely and said " I really don't know." I merely replied "okay" and we hanged up.

I called him and he said that they're going out AFTER she cleaned up her room. I told him that if they don't want me along because they're afraid of my moodiness, then i'll back off. He said "anything" and told me to ask her. I told him that she sounded pissed so nevermind. I also told him, "Look, if she doesn't want me along, she can just tell it to me straight. I'm not going to kill her."

What am I to do? Why does these things happen to me? What am I to seriously do???

Trying Out

2006-09-28T20:44:00.000+08:00

Good Evening,

Before I actually start anything, I would like to proclaim that I am not the season 1’s Singapore Idol Leandra! Thank you.

I am but a mere fourteen year old girl who have actually nothing better to do than to waste her life away. I am thinking of putting up my original stories so be on the lookout for that!

Thank you,
Leandra

~*...Step Into The Dark Abyss...*~

Heaven or Hell: Who will take me in?

=Blahx=

Oretachi no Seishun 俺たちの青春

Dreams Come True...?

Boredom

HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY, KAME-CHAN!!~

EARLY!

Sickness

Gomen nasai!

Leah-chan's Station Online NOW! ^_^

Gomen nasai...[A Reply to 'Amigo?']

MUSIC STATION LIVE!

SHINEH!

Uneasy, Unwell, Shacked & Empty

I'm updating...Finally Lolz

I've Been To The Year 3000~!

Christmas Is Not The Same Anymore

Outing With The Family!!! =)

Sweet Seventeen...?

VE Update!

My Week's Schedule

Thoughts

...^_^...

!NEWS!

*DROOLZ*

Up & Down Day

VE Outing

Sometimes...Fun Happens Without You...

FINALLY!

Tired Outta My Head

Lovely Complex

Disbelief Appears!

Gokuroosama!

...Step Into The Dark Abyss...

...Lost In The Sea Of Depression...

...Emo Shit...

Bad Day...Or Not...?

If Only I Could Stay Asleep, At Least I Could Pretend You're Thinking Of Me

The Video Is Out!

Yeah! WE DID IT!

There Are Many Things I Like To Say To You But I Don't Know How...

...Happenings...

Walk by Avenged Sevenfold

SINGFEST ROCKS!

Written Yesterday ^.^

Everything's Changing And I Feel Left Behind...

CAMERA-WHORES!

New Look Part II

New Look ^.^

BACK FROM FOREIGN BODIES CAMP!!!

There's A First Time For Everything

My Heart Can't Start Beating!

!!!SUCCESS!!!

No Pain, No Gain

...I'm Outta Cash...T.T

!Quick Hi!

Good Morning, Let The Stress Begin ^.^

...Tiredness Consumed My Mind, Pounding Deep Into My Mind...

...Astonishment Pounds My Head...

...Lost In A Small World...

...And So The Conflict Begins...A New Chapter In My Life...

!!!...I'm Baaccckkk...!!!

!WACKY!

Tired As Hell

Venting

Trying Out

~...Step Into The Dark Abyss...~

DROOLZ